This week, I have been feeling a little less than my happy self. So, I had some trouble with writing blog posts. I wear my heart on my sleeve and to write like all was just peachy in my world was not being my true self. I want my blog to be an encouraging place to stop by, but I also desire to be real. I am just not sure how much "realness" my readers really want. We have so much real life to deal with, I don't want to be a downer. But I also want to be authentic.
What do you say? How real do you think blogging moms should be? And when you are feeling down, do you blog about it or not?
I'm definitely very real and in fact this has been a topic of discussion amongst myself and a couple people lately. I've had 2 different people tell me that I'm too real in the things I write on my blog. That's exactly what I started blogging for in the first place, to be me and to be real. I'm a single mom and sharing the frustrations, triumphs, financial struggles, silly things, my love life, etc are all a part of me & I write about them. And for someone to come along and tell me that I'm too real and too open on my blog kind of irked me and rubbed me the wrong way & then I actually found myself doubting whether I should continue writing the things I write about but if I didn't continue writing the things I do there would be no blog. And one of the things that one of these people had a problem with was the fact that I was always talking about my boyfriend who is in the Army and deployed in Iraq right now. They told me that they were sure he wouldn't like the fact I wrote about him all the time so again I debated about writing about him or anything pertaining to the struggles of a relationship with an Army man that's deployed. But I had to remind myself that this is MY blog and nooone can tell me what to write about. The conclusion I came to was that if these people don't like reading what I write and think I'm too real, well then move on and leave me alone. I actually just posted about this yesterday and appropriately I titled it Back Off - This is My Blog!
Since I have set my blog up as a humorus look at parenting - through a redhead mom's eye - I am careful as to what I post. I ask myself how much I would want to read my post if I read it on another blogger's post. I try to stay on topic and not wander off into complaining about parts of my life that most everyone else has the same or more to deal with. Unless I have a great inovative solution - I don't post the problem - unless I can make it so damn funny that people laugh and add more grat funny comments.
Catherine, the redhead blogger
This is a really interesting question. A few days ago, I had a situation that I really need to vent about, just unleash a whole bunch of ugly thoughts, and I knew I couldn't do it on any of my blogs. Why? Because 1., I want my blogs to be family-friendly, and I knew I was going to want to use curse words in the rant, and 2., because I keep my blogs focused on the positive as much as possible, that's just the kind of blogs I have. So I went to a site called BitchyBetty.net and ranted away! I used exactly the words that fit my feelings, without having to worry that I would shock or offend anyone. It felt REALLY good.
I do post when I am feeling down about something, yes, but only if I really feel the need to. For me personally, I want people to come to my blogs and leave feeling good. However, I also have turned to my readers during some pretty tough times-illness, death in the family-and they have always responded supportively.
So I guess to answer your question, I think that you should decide what kind of blog you are going to have, and be consistent from the beginning. If you pepper your posts with "racy" language right from the beginning, you will attract readers who don't mind, and you won't have to worry about offending anyone. That's my opinion :)
I was once just words and an occasional faraway picture on my blog. Then I had the idea to do my mommy video show and had to be on camera. That was hard for me, because I could no longer be somewhat anonymous. I was totally out there. I did find that my readers appreciated knowing me in that way. Especially in the vlog entries. Me on camera, telling my stories really delighted them because they could fully get my off beat comedic timing. It was the ultimate way to open up to my readers.
It can make me feel pretty exposed and vulnerable. There's no hiding now. I've been "recognized" locally twice and both times I was a ridiculous looking mess. And yet, being more up front, really sharing myself with people brought in more readers and really made my following feel they could connect better with me.
I think readers crave that reality check in knowing they are just like you. There's comfort in that. I think there's a fine line between telling it all and exposing your secrets and just letting people in on how you handle your everyday life.
Does this make sense? I don't know. I'm still trying to figure it out myself!
Very real. Unless it is dangerous or would make someone uncomfortable I am willing to share it.:) I think a lot of it depends on what sort of space you have already. I am very much me on my personal blog and only talk about my art on my art blog. On the first I am very open about how things are going, on the second there is no need.
I struggled with this this week when we had a death in the family. I want to include the big things that are happening in our lives without wallowing in grief and being depressing or fishing for sympathy. It's like a tightrope walk.
I blog for myself. I want to read it when I'm 90 and remember all the little things that are great about my family. Does that make my blog too rosy? Maybe for some people, but I don't write it for them. I want to remember good times and funny times. Frustrations slip in there too, and there will be more of that, but it's a scrapbook for me, and a timeline, and I want it to be a positive one.
My blog is 99.9% real! There are moments, of course, that would be too raw to share, but for the most part, what you see if what you get with me.
I ,too, am a heart-on-my-sleeve person, but I think that can be appealing to people. Makes you real & approachable. Atleast, I think that is why people read my blog....they know they are reading something genuine.
Or, atleast i hope that is why they read. ;)
ps I don't think there is anything wrong with sharing things like, had a fight with your husband, on a blog. But, maybe not all the details...KWIM?
Mom Bloggers for Social Good is a global coalition of 2000+ mom bloggers who currently span over twenty countries and who care about spreading the good news about the amazing work non-profit organizations and NGOs are doing around the world. Want to make a difference?Please join us!
Toxic Free Blog - by Brittany Glynn
Brittany is a director of the Toxic Free Foundation and created the first ever Toxic Free Certification Program. Weekly, Brittany publishes the Toxic Free Blog and provides coaching to over 10,000 families in the United States alone. She is the author of a Toxic Free educational series and co-author of several Toxic Free learning programs. Brittany is also an award winning author.