How do we know if we are raising our child correctly? Since there is no manual that pops out with the baby, we search for answers by asking our friends, buying books on motherhood, seeing a therapist, asking our parents or all of the above. What we are getting is someone else's experience of raising a child based on their individual issues and/or awareness'. So, the question is "How do I find the right way to raise a child based on my own issues, awarenesses, talents, philosophy, spirituality, genes etc.?" It is really quite simple. Find out who you are! The glitch is - we have to be honest with ourselves and ask the hard questions. Being honest with yourself is 75% of the process. The other 25% is to question your answers.
I have put together 74 questions. Every question is an insight into the mind and intentions of the person answering. First, we must answer the questions HONESTLY! Next, we need to look at the answers and question the answer. "What do I mean by that?" "I had no idea that I felt that way." "I really don't like that answer!" "Am I really that shallow?" "Am I really that nice?" And finally, we question the following answers and then the following answers until we have found the "right" answer (whatever that means to YOU).
There is no book that can address our own specific individual issues. We are all so unique in our ethnicity, environment, family dynamic, genetic makeup, We are all ONE OF A KIND! So, by answering a wide range of questions we begin to gain insight into who we really are. After all, isn't that what a psychiatrist does? They ask you questions. When they get a response, they delve into that subject by asking more questions. The reason why people go to a psychiatrist or therapist is that they don't know what questions to ask and it's easier to pay someone who will "make" you tell the truth rather than have to tell the truth by yourself. Save hundreds of bucks and be your own therapist.
The questions I pose range from "Is it possible to have faith and be afraid at the same time?" to "Do you know every organ in your body?". I hope you visit this blog and answer the questions yourselves. After you have studied and scrutinized your answers put them away. Wait a couple of weeks before picking up the answers again and see if, or how, your behavior has changed. It can be a wonderful process of self discovery or a painful experience or both! The blog is www.therearequestionstoeveryanswer.blogspot.com.
So, back to motherhood! You will be a wonderful mother who knows exactly what to do once you have a clear picture of who you are. Your issues may not disappear right away but now you will be vigilant and recognize when and how they affect your life and determine your decisions. I look forward to your comments and feel free to add more questions to share with all of us. Remember - YOU HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS!
Let me just add a disclaimer about psychiatrist and therapist. They are certainly necessary for people who need them.