When Your Child Asks You Not to Blog About Them Anymore..........

What would you say?

My near 10 year old has asked me not to blog about her anymore. She's becoming self-aware and feels embarassed and silly from my posts. I never try to portray my children in a negative light. I just write what my heart feels and the emotions that impact me from our interactions.

She enjoys reading my posts and I hear her laughing at many of them, but the ones about her are affecting her in some way.

Any suggestions?

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WOW everything you said, my Hubby suggested too!! 10 is too young for her to have a blog, but we're still going to be working on this, thanks for the response Molly!
Hmmmm - personally, I would have to respect my daughter's wishes. I feel like I'm being selfish with the time I spend on the computer already...if it really bothered her, I'd feel I owed her that. (just my 2 cents.:)
So true. *sigh*

Sue said:
Hmmmm - personally, I would have to respect my daughter's wishes. I feel like I'm being selfish with the time I spend on the computer already...if it really bothered her, I'd feel I owed her that. (just my 2 cents.:)
I have to agree with Sue. As moms, we have to pick our battles, and this might be one that you may have to stand down on. Later on when you need to win a battle, maybe she will remember this. (Yeah, right! LOL!) If you really want to blog about her, maybe you could start an additional blog that is a little more private?
This is a difficult situation indeed. While I can't offer direct advice from my parenting experience (as you know, my girls are all under the age of 5), I do feel that I would try to respect their wishes if they get older and ask me to stop. It's tough though, because as a mom, you should be able to blog about your 'everyday' experiences with your family. But, on the other hand, it's soooooooo important to respect your daughter's privacy. Especially during the tween years. I can completely understand the fact that she's mortified her friends may read your post. Although, personally, I find them funny! LOL

I like the suggestion about "checking in" with your daughter before you post something about her. Let her have some control over the situation. Tweens (and teens!) love that sorta power! If she absolutely rejects your post about her, then I'd respect her privacy. Whew! Hope some of that helped!
How about a middle ground? To me, part of the point of mommy blogging is to record our lives as they really are, and then to share these things with our kids when they are ready. What if you wrote your blogs as usual, but if it is about her, she gets veto power? Write it down, since that is part of what is important. Let her read it- if she says ok, then hit publish. If she says no, save it in a different spot, but definitely keep it. When she is 35 and struggling with her own kids, being able to read your words will be a gift to her.
She's obviously old enough to be aware of what you're writing and what she's asking. If she has asked you to respect her privacy, you need to do that. It's not about "the point of mommy blogging," it's about respecting our children as we would expect them to respect us and not violating their trust. I would recommend agreeing with her and then, if there's something you really want to write about, ask her on a case by case basis if it's okay and allow her the ability to do some editing. And if she says no, respect her wishes.
When I said "the point of mommy blogging" was to record our lives, I was not talking about the point being to disrespect your children. I was meaning more that it is like a personal diary and gives you an outlet. It can be kept private. In no way did I suggest that blogging was more important than respecting your children's needs and wishes, and I certainly hope you did not think I was saying anything otherwise.


jinniver said:
She's obviously old enough to be aware of what you're writing and what she's asking. If she has asked you to respect her privacy, you need to do that. It's not about "the point of mommy blogging," it's about respecting our children as we would expect them to respect us and not violating their trust. I would recommend agreeing with her and then, if there's something you really want to write about, ask her on a case by case basis if it's okay and allow her the ability to do some editing. And if she says no, respect her wishes.
Obviously I don't have to worry about it for a while since my son is only 1, but when I started I told myself if he ever asked me to stop, I would. Unconditionally. It's awkward enough being a pre-teen without having the whole interwebs seeing you from your MOM's perspective. I like the idea of asking her on a case-by-case basis, since that way she can control what is out there. Good luck!
Thanks everyone for your ideas and input, i'm taking it to heart! I don't need a 'tween' with hormones raging mad at me for my words too. I will respect her wishes, and compromise with photos and if any stories are important to post, i'll talk with her.

One day if I have time/energy i may make a private blog that she doesn't read.
I rarely blog about our 2 older daughters unless it's something from when they were little. They are 19 and 24 and I don't think they would appreciate it. Our 2 younger children are 10 and 6 and so far it's been ok. I'm very careful and I don't post pictures of them and don't use their real names. Our 10 year old is ok with it that way. She enjoys the blog and loves to help make our "Elle & Stacy" videos and really looks forward to that time together. But if she asked me to stop, it would be hard,but I would do it.
See, THIS is why you have them sign a release right away, so sticky problems like this won't hold up in a court of law;)

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