Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Margot Finke on February 26, 2011 at 4:25pm

Patrica, I so admire your guts and courage.  At my age, I could not imagine having to raise a young child.  Of course I suspect I am far older than you, and that is a factor.  Twenty years ago it would have been a different matter.  Your grandson inherited lousy parents, but lucked out with grandma and grandpa.  I am sure he knows he is loved and wanted by both of you, and that is what all kids need - love and security.  You are my heroes!!

 

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Permalink Reply by Patricia Johnson on February 26, 2011 at 5:24pm

thank you to both of you.  I know that at 50 years of age I really did not want to be a parent again, but actually, the second time around was better because I was able to do more with him than with my own son.  It has been a fun ride, and I am sure there are more thrills around each and every curve on the road ahead.  His mother recently got remarried but before she married this dude, she had another baby but kept that one.  I know my grandson wonders at time why mom kept the newest baby but gave him away.  She sees him every other weekend for about fours hours, her choice, not ours.  It is more like a chore than anything else.  His father is on the run from the law and we have no idea where he is.  Again, thanks for the comments and the warm welcome.  If there are any grandparents that are "second time" around parents, drop me a line.

Permalink Reply by PartlySunny on February 27, 2011 at 6:16pm

You made me think of my friend who's been taking care of her grandson off and on. Unfortunately, they weren't able to get legal guardianship, so they've been pawns in their scenario. It's very sad. I'm glad for you and your grandson's sake that things have worked out this way. He's a very lucky boy to have you.

Permalink Reply by Patricia Johnson on February 27, 2011 at 7:44pm

We have temporary guardianship of our grandson.  Fortunately dad was willing to sign the papers giving us temporary guardianship.  We had no idea where his mom was so the attorney we had put an ad in the newspaper for 4 weeks, which is the legal requirement here in Indiana, and if she did not respond to the ad, she would have given up her rights to say no to the guardianship.  We were just a few days from the deadline when she showed up at our attorney's office,  She refused to sign the papers so we went to court.  At court, at least in Indiana, you could have witnesses for and against the guardianship.  We had witnesses but she didn't so we got temporary guardianship.  It is sad when two parents cannot think of what is best for the child(ren).  When they use the child and grandparents as pawns in their little scenario, then that makes them look like two kids fighting over a toy in the sandbox.  Has your friend seen an attorney?  If your friend belongs to this group, have her drop me a line if she needs a sounding board.

Permalink Reply by Kristin Peoples on March 1, 2011 at 3:46pm

We had temporary guardianship of my husband's cousin.  Mom was gone and Grandmom was too old to take care of her.  I applaud what you are doing.  I know it's not always easy.