** Short weeks make you feel like every day is Friday.** They also make you angry to find out that every day is not, in fact, Friday.** I've totally forgotten what the sun even looks like.** Apparently I'm an asshole because I served my kids ice cream that was "too cold".** Being fired never…See More
** It's hard to play Dr. Kevorkian, even to a Beta fish who's dying a very slow death.** Helping with Spanish homework when you don't speak a lick of Spanish is like trying to cook a gourmet meal when you can't even boil water.** Sometimes a nap is more important than a workout.** Say what you will about Howard Stern, but the man is a GREAT freaking interviewer.** When you come across "Good Fellas"…See More
** I'm not buying whatever Mother Nature is selling.** My transformation from human to crocodile is nearly complete, thanks to all the dry heat in my house.** Suddenly a Snuggie doesn't seem like such a dumb idea.** You know it's cold outside when your family room feels like an igloo.**…See More
** 'Tis the season to feel like a walking ATM.** If you're a fan of torturing yourself, I highly recommend going to the mall two weekends before Christmas.** We need to bring nap time back (for me, not for the kids).** When I get my car washed or my hair done, you can bet your ass it's gonna rain.** I have a knack for picking the checkout lane with the MOTHER of all problems.** A week off of…See More
** If my kids overflow one more toilet around here, they're getting an outhouse for Christmas.** I could really use an elf.** Getting Christmas cards in the mail is so much better than getting bills in the mail.** Antlers are for reindeer, NOT for cars.** It's no fun to be stalked by a bitch named Insomnia.**…See More
** I'm not sure what's disappearing faster around here -- my money or our iPhone chargers.** When one of your son's best friends has pink eye, YOUR eyes immediately start to itch like a mofo.** The stupidity of the human population never ceases to amaze/entertain me.** There most definitely ARE stupid…See More
** This time of the year makes me so very grateful for my beloved hot glue gun.** I may steal the dog crate from the dog -- it just looks so darn PRIVATE in there.** Judging by his wardrobe choices, I'm pretty sure my son is colorblind.** Kids are so sweet about coughing their germs all over your freaking face.** If you can remember if you brushed your teeth & put on deodorant today, you're a better…See More
** I'm not sure what scares me more -- Ebola or the thought of having to use the toilet in my kids' bathroom.** The best hair days always happen when you have absolutely NOWHERE to go.** Canker sores are the root of all evil.** My memory and my eyesight are having a race to see who's deteriorating the fastest.** I often feel about as appreciated around my house as a winter coat on a hot…See More
** I am totally addicted to selling crap on virtual garage sale sites.** Finding a CLEAN gas station bathroom is like finding a unicorn.** Carpool duty should be immediately followed by wine.** Eating with a jock cup on the table is, unfortunately, a regular occurrence in our house.** It's time to get cracking on Halloween costumes since my son insists on being a waffle this year.** My…See More
** My mind thinks I’m 21, but my body, not so much.** There’s no such thing as tiptoeing back into reality after vacation.** George Clooney apparently got tired of waiting for me.** The sink in my kids’ bathroom looks like a…See More
** My house is a revolving door of loud, screeching short people. (And I kind of love it.)** Wearing a dress AND a bra all in one day is quite an accomplishment.** Apparently, finding a random object like a screwdriver in the fridge doesn't even begin to faze me.** Standardized test scores should seriously come with a human translator.** It would be awesome if my personal chef, butler,…See More
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My name is Missy and I am also a member of the Mom Bloggers Club. I have a blog, www.luxurybeautyproducts.blogspot.com and I also run the blog hop network.
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