All Blog Posts Tagged 'humor' (613)

Just Add Water

I recently had a rather humiliating experience that I finally decided to share with the world…in hopes I can make you laugh today. Last week my husband was
out of town and I was home alone with the girls.yes""> Usually this stresses me out, but not this time. I was quite calm and was having fun with
my daughters.


...Continue

Added by Lanita Moss on April 6, 2010 at 7:30am — No Comments

Ode to the McDonald's Hamburger

I am a child of the 60’s and I admit that I love McDonald’s hamburgers. Not the cheeseburger, not the Quarter Pounder, not the Big Mac…but a simple hamburger. I also admit that I have eaten at

McDonald’s all over the world and there is some comfort in walking into the

golden arches and knowing that the hamburger will taste the same in Moscow as

in Wichita.



...…

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Added by Lanita Moss on April 2, 2010 at 7:22am — No Comments

It's Not Fair

mso-ansi-language:EN-US;mso-fareast-language:EN-US"">When we first adopted our

daughter Bunny from Guatemala, I was in law school and rather than adopt her,

take her from the only home she knew and throw her into daycare…we opted for a

nanny. Our Nanny was Indian/Pakistani…a

beautiful young woman raised in Orange County, CA…long story that I won’t go

into now.…








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Added by Lanita Moss on March 31, 2010 at 7:35am — No Comments

The Cock I Got in Jamaica

I collect roosters, a lot of them. At last count there were over 90 roosters/chickens in my kitchen. All reside in the kitchen because my husband won’t grant them visas to migrate past the boundaries of the kitchen. Some are old, some new, some art deco, some classic and some from around the world.… Continue

Added by Lanita Moss on March 26, 2010 at 8:55am — No Comments

My First Attempt at Indian Cooking

Recently I went back to my hometown for a few days to visit friends and revisit my childhood. One night for dinner my friend suggested that we eat at her favorite

Indian restaurant. I had to admit

I had never eaten Indian food before, but I was up for anything. My 11 year old wasn’t very thrilled,

but she recently discovered she liked guacamole, so Indian couldn’t be that

different. Was she ever in for a

surprise!…

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Added by Lanita Moss on March 23, 2010 at 2:58pm — No Comments

My First Mother-Daughter Road Trip

Over my daughter’s spring break I decided to take her on a road trip, not to the beach, nor skiing in the mountains, but back to my hometown. I grew up in a small

farming community in east-central Illinois.yes""> Look Tolono up on a map, you might find it just south of

Champaign. It is a 7-hour drive,

so Elle and I packed up Sarge and headed east.yes""> We had ample tunes and conversation to keep us awake and

alert for the…

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Added by Lanita Moss on March 22, 2010 at 7:15pm — No Comments

Coffee Cups

Are you like me and have a favorite coffee cup? I have a few that rank in order of my fondness for them. Our coffee mug shelf is made up of a mish-mash of different cups. There is a set of matching mugs with roosters painted on them, but they rank far down on my Fondness List. And then there are mugs that have different purposes. Some mugs are used for tea,… Continue

Added by Lanita Moss on March 17, 2010 at 10:30am — No Comments

Meatloaf With a Side of Mathematics

I’m not like most mothers…or so I thought. I don’t particularly care to read to my kids at night (I end up wanting to go to sleep), I hated bath time (even with a book and a glass of wine) and enrolling my kids in endless activities and chauffeuring them around seems like utter torture. Don’t get me wrong, I love my children, but a lot of the… Continue

Added by Lanita Moss on March 15, 2010 at 10:15am — No Comments

I Don't Let Just Anyone See My Underwear

My husband and I fold laundry together. It’s one of the only chores we can share and still enjoy each other’s company, not only because it’s the only household job that neither of us has passively and purposely fumbled to get out of, but because we joke around a lot while we’re folding, like we just met.



The conversation is also mixed with nostalgia.



“When did our baby start wearing size 12 jeans?” We hold the boys’ pants up to ourselves and observe how close they are to… Continue

Added by Amy Musing on March 11, 2010 at 11:26am — No Comments

The Things I Wish I Knew When I Became a Mom

1. That a 2 year old is perfectly capable of dead bolting the front door (this I learned when left stranded outside after getting the mail, in sub-zero temperatures with no jacket on). Also that it would take 20 minutes to talk said 2 year old through reversing the process and unlocking the door (accompanied with lots of tears and cries of "I can't do it!")… Continue

Added by Aging Mommy on March 9, 2010 at 9:47pm — No Comments

The Fertility Blessing

Kendall, Cybella, Mark Allen, Camryn , Mya, Deshawn, Jacob, Irvin V, Gilbert III, Jordan, Adain, Christian, Gabrielle and Taylor.





The above list is not the class roster for my child’s pre-k class… nope it is a list of cousins that were born after my oldest chilld. All of these children are related to my girls, not good friends, but blood cousins. I will not even mention the five or six cousins that came before her.





Our…

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Added by Sleepless on February 26, 2010 at 5:10pm — No Comments

Playing With Trains at Midnight

Hmm, time for Not Me! Monday. You want honesty? You got it! My next New York City Moms blog article was not overdue. I finally finished it this morning and it’s in the cue. I’ll let you know when it gets published. It’s called “Natural Birth, Duggar Style.” I do not still owe someone a book review, have to watch a video about breastfeeding and write the review, and manage 1781…
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Added by Dagmar Bleasdale on February 8, 2010 at 7:30pm — No Comments

Non-Verbal Communication in Marriage: What to Look for What it Means

I consider myself an expert in the field of Non-Verbal Communication. My husband is an engineer, which is to say he has a PhD in Non-Verbal Communication. He was on the Dean’s list when I met him. He flourished under the tutelage of a blue collar step-father, a man of few words: “Who left the milk out?” and “I’m going out.”



I am psychic. I can read my mind. I think everyone else should be able to, too. Especially if we’ve spent more than an hour trauma bonding. Or if we’ve been… Continue

Added by Amy Musing on February 8, 2010 at 8:09am — No Comments

The Book Wasn't Worth it but the Revenge Was

I did not walk into the library today with the intention of playing head games with the brittle-boned, fastidious, In-Rules-We-Trust librarian. But she, and her rule fixation, drove me to it. Two polar opposites come together and you get this sort of chemical reaction.



She is eyeing me in my sweats and frizzy curls. I am eyeing her beige, ironed…is that a Dorothy Hamill haircut? I almost say it out loud. The way I would shout with excitement: Is that an original Spyrograph?!!! if I… Continue

Added by Amy Musing on February 1, 2010 at 2:44pm — No Comments

Truthful/Tell all Tuesdays

Ok, Ladies its Tuesday and ,as I said, today is the day we can all vent "anonymously" if preferred, and get everything off our minds..without judgement:)I will start the ball rolling:

Is it wrong that sometimes I wish I was brave enough to dose my kids with ibuprofin, so they would go to sleep at a reasonable hour without me having to lay down with them?

Sometimes, I really miss my life before I was married or had kids, so much so that I fantasize about who I used to be:)LOL

OK,… Continue

Added by Deborah A Cruz-Beck on January 26, 2010 at 8:10am — No Comments

If You See a Guy with This Expression, Run Away!!

ven though I told myself I would never ever do this on a weekend, I found myself, yet again, in the crowded grocery store on Sunday. I needed to go up the bread aisle and there was a man coming my way, pushing a cart. He looked like he wasn’t used to grocery shopping or pushing a cart, or being anyplace, really, other than a golf course or a leather couch, smoking a cigar and dusting off his reading glasses with an Egyptian linen handkerchief that has his initials embroidered on the diagonal of… Continue

Added by Amy Musing on December 15, 2009 at 7:39am — No Comments

Confessions of a Breast Feeder

I have wonderful things to say about breastfeeding. In fact here are my top 5 reasons why I like breast feeding



•It lets you bond with your child

•It is cheaper than formula

•You give your child the antibodies they need

•It is the perfect food for your child

•It helps you lose the baby weight





You see … nothing but great things to say. Of course my sister in law holds the record … between her two children she has been nursing for 5 years… Continue

Added by Sleepless on November 25, 2009 at 10:00am — No Comments

The Pilot Episode of Desperate Roommates

In the neighborhood I moved to my second year out of college, a sublet was easier to find than a studio apartment. I sat in a diner booth and circled classifieds in the “room for rent” column of The Ann Arbor News, called each number and was able to line up four apartments in one afternoon. All of which were in walking distance to the ad agency where I’d begin work in one week. I still had to drive three states away to get my furniture and drive it back in a U-Haul. That didn’t leave much… Continue

Added by Amy Musing on November 10, 2009 at 9:56am — No Comments

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