** It's gotta be a scientific fact that kids are 10 times crazier in the summer.
** Kicking your own ass is harder than having someone else kick it for you.
** I'm not above napping in public.
** Someone needs to punch me the next time I decide that 4 weeks without summer camp is a good idea.
** Since we didn't win…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 9, 2013 at 10:21am — No Comments
** The revolving door of kids, dirt, and craziness must mean it's FINALLY Summer.
** Moms should get a cut of all lemonade stand profits.
** And somebody totally…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 14, 2013 at 7:06pm — No Comments
** I often wonder whether I live in a house with two kids or a house with two pigs.
** Driving past a lemonade stand without stopping makes me feel guilty.
** I may or may not be a sucker.
** Gravity can kiss my ass (especially since it's responsible for knocking it down in the first place).
** Parenting without a…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 24, 2012 at 1:42pm — No Comments
** Half days of school are only awesome if you're a kid or a teacher. Or bat shit crazy.
** Birthdays are chock-full of calories.
** Sometimes it's better to pretend like you don't know your family.
** The front of my car is attracted to jackasses who don't drive the speed limit.
** Nothing says I love you quite…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 20, 2012 at 2:20pm — No Comments
** My world is just a series of pee splatters and poo.
** It's a true challenge not to laugh when telling your eight year old how inappropriate it is to yell "cocks".
** Throwing food can be liberatingly fun.
** Pretending to be stupid so you can cut in line is sooooooo not cool.
** Some sick a-hole had…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 19, 2011 at 10:50am — No Comments
Dear Liquor Store,
Perhaps you may have heard some rumblings about the impending summer vacation that's about to pounce on the town here any day now. Yes, kids will soon be out terrorizing the streets and pimping lemonade hardcore on every effing corner. They will be changing their clothes 357 times a day, thereby creating even more…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 19, 2011 at 3:35pm — No Comments