** If you take up two parking spaces, you shouldn't be surprised when you're door-dinged.
** Putting my husband in charge of homework supervision is like putting my kids in charge of homework supervision.…
** Surprisingly, a quiet house kinda creeps me out.
** Mother Nature is a ruthless Bitch with a capital "B".
** "The Great Gatsby" was unfortunately not all that great.
** I would get lost inside a cardboard box. (No, seriously, how do I get out of this thing?)
** Grown men fighting in a bar is the…Continue
** The silverware thief is at it again.
** It's hard to have an adult conversation when you see your kid making armpit farts out of the corner of your eye.
** Crying over spilled milk is totally justified when it's a mere millimeter from your laptop.
** If burping is the sign of a good meal, then snoring is surely the sign of a good…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on September 7, 2012 at 6:30pm — No Comments
** If you think they might spill it, they absolutely, most definitely will spill it.
** My blood is a molotov cocktail of Allegra, Singulair and Advil.
** It may feel like lice, but sometimes, it's just dry scalp.
** Bangin' your forehead on a granite countertop is not as exciting as it may…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on October 14, 2011 at 10:30am — No Comments
** Just hearing the word "lice" makes my head itch.
** A freight train accompanied by a brass marching band would be quieter than my children.
** Halloween decorations make me happy.
** Sun-baked dog poop is anything but easy to scoop.
** People actually eat fried Kool-aid without being paid to do so. …Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on October 7, 2011 at 11:29am — No Comments