This story takes place a couple of years ago when Jake was in 3rd grade and ranks a magnitude 10 on the Richtor scale of embarrassment. This was when I was working again full time and less hopeless (I joke). Anyway, Craig and I usually spent our weekends…
It's official! Trying to get my kids ready for school is like waging a full fledged war on time-management! Let me break down this morning's routine as we prepare to breach the castle like some sort of crazed screaming barbarians. And yes, someone will be calling to confirm my reservation at the nut…Continue
Added by Jennifer Weilk on March 7, 2012 at 10:00am — No Comments
Added by Jennifer Weilk on March 6, 2012 at 5:34pm — No Comments
Good News! I got my car washed, and it's squeaky clean.
Well, maybe not squeaky clean....
My minivan gets disgusting. I have to clean it before going to the carwash: Pick up discarded cheese-stick wrappers and Goldfish bags, squashed Fig Newtons. Scrape up encrusted spilled coffee from the cup holders. Pry up from floor mats sticky candy canes or melted Gummy Bears.
At the carwash, I can barely look those…Continue
** If I ever turn up missing, a vineyard in Sonoma is most likely where you'll find me.
** My daughter thinks I was born in 1818. Seriously, she asked if that was my birth year. WTF?!
** Entirely too many people think they have the right of way.
** Elementary School Open House could also be referred to as Nuts on a Stick. …Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 24, 2012 at 8:09pm — No Comments
Don't you just love how candid kids can be? Especially when it comes at your own personal expense? Just think how awesome it would be if, as adults, we could say exactly what we think and have people chuckle and say how darn cute we are. Unfortunately, however, we'd most likely end up getting our asses kicked and be unfriended by every single person we know on Facebook.
Luckily, for my daughter, it's still pretty hilarious when she asks me why my boobs aren't "as big as…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 23, 2012 at 9:22am — No Comments
** A lovely Valentine's morning can quickly turn to a red and pink poop storm when you're a parent.
** If the smell of your own morning breath is making you gag, you know it's time to brush those pearly whites.
** I always seem to park in the spot where some lazy jackhole has left his unreturned shopping cart.
** Cookie bouquets…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 18, 2012 at 11:53am — No Comments
Parenthood, we have a problem. My sweet baby girl has gone off the deep end. Even though she's only eight years old, I'm seriously considering enrolling her in Maury Povich's boot camp. Or a chain gang. Or both. Cause seriously? This shit's gotta stop. The kid has been sent to the principal's office not once but TWICE in one week, and one of those times was on…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 15, 2012 at 1:27pm — No Comments
** Bloating and cramping are God's way of saying, "Sucks to be you!!!"
** Giselle Bundchen needs to be introduced to the wonderful world of duct tape.
** A rotten bag of mushrooms makes your…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 10, 2012 at 10:51am — No Comments
Obviously, I love my kids with every little fiber of my being, but I swear to, well......you, actually, that they're involved in some sort of conspiracy theory to drive me straight to the loony bin. Seriously, if I didn't know any better, I'd think they'd bought stock in Crazy Town, which is clearly where I'll be residing soon enough. Any potential…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 8, 2012 at 4:52pm — No Comments
Three (3) lucky LAB readers will receive signed copies of the book!
How do I enter? You have a few options AND EACH COUNTS AS ONE ENTRY. There is NO LIMIT to the number of times a reader can enter (via any of the entry channels) this contest.…Continue
Added by Vera Sweeney on February 8, 2012 at 10:43am — No Comments
http://singlehoodtomotherhood.blogspot.comFor most of my adult life I worked in real estate. There are many perks to being self-employed; the hours, the flexibility, the independence. The downside of course is the lack of steady income. If you are not good at time management or self-motivation it can be really tough. This is why, industry wide, there are always seminars on how to manage your time effectively, how to…Continue
Added by Ellie Lavi on February 1, 2012 at 3:30am — No Comments
We've all had a conversation with THAT mom at one time or another. The one who can't talk to you like a normal human being because she's so busy telling you how talented and smart and perfect her child is and "don't you think he's amazing?"
Added by America's Next Top Mommy on January 31, 2012 at 9:21am — No Comments
** Your cabin fever's reached Code Red when you're jealous of the squirrels outside breathing in all that fresh, freezing cold air.
** Trying to work a crossword puzzle when you're tired just makes you feel stupid. And tired.
** I've washed my hands so many times over the past few days that I may no longer have fingerprints.
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 27, 2012 at 10:32am — No Comments
** Skinny celebrities who say they get their cardio by "chasing their kids around" are more full of shit than my backyard.
** I don't have a few new leaves to turn over -- I have a whole damn PILE.
** Victoria's Secret catalogs that arrive in the dead of January when we're all a little heftier from the holidays can suck…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 13, 2012 at 11:22am — No Comments
Added by Just a Marketing Mom on January 6, 2012 at 10:42pm — No Comments
Check out my blog: Baddha Konasana
Added by Abby Billings on December 29, 2011 at 5:18pm — No Comments
Added by Lisa Cash Hanson on December 29, 2011 at 2:23am — No Comments
When people used to tell me, "Get the sleep you can now because you'll never sleep again," I laughed. I now know the kind of fatigue I battle on a daily basis is nothing like the days after late nights at work or cramming for tests in college. I'd also hear about "mom brain" and how formerly brilliant women have been rendered useless by the theory that pregnancy feeds off brain cells. I thought that was a myth too until I found myself…Continue
Added by Nicole Wolfrath on December 28, 2011 at 12:45pm — No Comments
Boxing Day used to be a high point for many of us parents. After a year of buying full-price retail items and perhaps getting some items on sale every so often, this one day of the year promised to relieve us from the financial strain of raising children in a modern world. Kids, after all, are expensive.
While the holidays proved to be a high point of the year, let's face it: getting a snowsuit or new running shoes for our children at 60 per cent off was almost too much to bear.…
Added by Samantha Kemp-Jackson on December 26, 2011 at 4:46pm — No Comments