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Jennifer Marshall's Blog Posts Tagged 'pets' (11)

Goatdog and the Pizza Man Incident

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Most of you know by now that our Goatdog is one crazy son of a bitch (literally -- cause, you know, he's a DOG).  He's body-slammed himself through a glass door, eaten my kitchen chairs, and taken a giant dump right in the middle of a dinner party.  And he absolutely loses his mind if a strange man is on our…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on March 20, 2014 at 10:17am — No Comments

The Man in Brown



It's amazing to me how Goatdog and I can have such differing opinions of the UPS man. We're talking complete opposite ends of the spectrum, people.  I just so happen to LOVE a visit from the man in brown.  I mean, he brings me wine and shoes and sassy new dresses -- what girl wouldn't love that??!  Goatdog,…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 6, 2013 at 11:43pm — No Comments

Somebody Stop Me Before I Get A Damn Puppy

I don't know whether I've lost my mind or if my ovaries are bored, but lately, I've had both babies AND puppies on the brain.  Now I know that deep down, I don't REALLY want to go back to that whole beginning stage of sleep deprivation and cleaning up poo every ten minutes.  But, that certainly hasn't stopped me from obsessing…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 16, 2013 at 6:24pm — No Comments

If It SMELLS Like Poo, It Probably IS Poo

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Goatdog continues to amaze me with the ridiculously crazy things he chooses to eat. Lately, he's munched on everything from aluminum foil to snotty Kleenex's.  The more…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 25, 2013 at 1:48pm — No Comments

Ride On

EVERYBODY NEEDS A CO-PILOT.

(Even if he DOES steal your socks and bite…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 28, 2013 at 2:32pm — No Comments

A Smile's Worth A Thousand Woofs

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You likely know by now that Goatdog is generally a giant thorn in my side and that I often contemplate turning him into the main course for our Thanksgiving dinner.  That being said, though, he has somehow managed to worm his wicked way into our hearts with all of his quirky little…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on November 15, 2012 at 4:14pm — 1 Comment

Thundershirt My Ass

Our dog has earned many a nickname in his three years with the family -- Goatdog, asshole, jackass, dick.  But the one name that kinda surprises me (especially given the fact that he body slammed himself through the friggin' front door) is WIMP.  Yes, for some reason, the big lug turns into one giant wussbag when it comes to thunderstorms.

Of…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on September 13, 2012 at 12:03pm — 3 Comments

Bad Dog

 

So lately, our dog has really been pressing his luck around here.  Just when I think I might actually kinda like the big ol' doofus, he goes and does something SO incredibly naughty that I wanna open the front door and allow him to become a street dog.  And unfortunately for my mother-in-law, his latest incredibly naughty "something" just so happened to…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on October 19, 2011 at 10:18am — No Comments

Charrrrrrrrrrrge!!!!

If you've been following my blog for any length of time, you know by now that Goatdog and I have a love/hate relationship.  Sure, he may look cute and all, but don't let that fool ya for even one little second:

 

 

He is the Tazmanian Devil disguised as an Airedale.  You'd see just what I mean if you were to watch him in action when someone approaches our front…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on September 22, 2011 at 2:13pm — No Comments

The Unfortunate Trash Can Fiasco

 

When you're a dog owner, like it or not, scooping the poop kinda just goes with the territory -- at least it's supposed to anyway.  And unlike some of the other yahoos around here, I would personally never leave a steaming pile of lawn sausages in my neighbor's front yard.  It's just not the neighborly thing to do.  Now do I enjoy picking up a handful of…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 16, 2011 at 12:57pm — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

 

** Cruise control scares the shit out of me.

 

** When you travel with kids, it's a trip.  When you travel without them, it's a vacation.

 

** 99.9% of the water at water parks is a combination of urine and ick.  Probably.

 

** Trying to get your kids to sleep at a water park is like trying to get a nun to pole…

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Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 19, 2011 at 1:30pm — No Comments

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