** I'm not buying whatever Mother Nature is selling.
** My transformation from human to crocodile is nearly complete,…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 9, 2015 at 3:45pm — No Comments
** I've seen no less than 14,789 people dump ice over their heads throughout the past few days.
** Being the adult is often times way harder than being the kid.
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 22, 2014 at 5:39pm — No Comments
** A backyard campout for the kids is so much more fun when it’s in someone else’sbackyard.
** Facebook should really be called…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 26, 2014 at 12:39am — No Comments
** It's evidently mating season for a-holes.
** If I never go to the U.S. Post Office again, it'll be too soon.
** Summer needs to just…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 19, 2014 at 12:24am — No Comments
** June somehow pulled a giant disappearing act on us.
** The more laundry I have to fold, the more I dream about becoming a nudist…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 4, 2014 at 8:04pm — No Comments
** It takes a village. To raise a husband.
** The world is way too incredibly full of itself.
** Surprisingly, it's been 20 years since OJ got away…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 13, 2014 at 5:42pm — No Comments
Maybe it's just me, but the end of the school year always seems to bring with it a boatload of unwanted stress. Finding a "place" for all the papers that are sent home, trying not to drown in the flood of never-ending emails, buying the gazillion and one thank you gifts -- IT NEVER EVER…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 12, 2014 at 4:02pm — No Comments
** The end-of-the-school-year craziness must surely subtract five years off a mom's life.
** I am sooooooooo done with the packing of the lunches.
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 6, 2014 at 7:34pm — No Comments
** If you take up two parking spaces, you shouldn't be surprised when you're door-dinged.
** Putting my husband in charge of homework supervision is like putting my kids in charge of homework supervision.…
** Whoever sent the Polar Vortex an invitation to return is in need of a good ass kicking.
** If I wanted to live in Antarctica, I would've moved to Antarctica.…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 31, 2014 at 1:38pm — No Comments
** If I looked like David Beckham, I'd be naked ALL the time.
** I'm a firm Belieber that Justin needs a big ol' time…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 24, 2014 at 10:21am — No Comments
** School REALLY needs to start. Cause my patience has left the building.
** The smell of an amusement park is a compilation of B.O., grease, and ass.
** I'm not…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 24, 2013 at 11:44am — No Comments
** It's gotta be a scientific fact that kids are 10 times crazier in the summer.
** Kicking your own ass is harder than having someone else kick it for you.
** I'm not above napping in public.
** Someone needs to punch me the next time I decide that 4 weeks without summer camp is a good idea.
** Since we didn't win…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 9, 2013 at 10:21am — No Comments
With summer camps ending, I have become the unofficial director of "Camp Mama", who's expected to have full-day schedules of wild and exciting adventures planned for each and every day. Thus, my time for writing even something as small as a to-do list has become pretty much non-existent. The following is what I…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 25, 2013 at 8:47pm — No Comments
** Mornings love me WAY more than I love them.
** This week's heat wave has made being a nudist seem a whole lot more appealing.
** I get more stupid with…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 19, 2013 at 6:45pm — No Comments
** I guess I accidentally skipped a week of keeping track of what I've learned. Oopsy.
** The beach is truly my happy place.
** Soap operas really are unnecessary…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on July 12, 2013 at 4:54pm — No Comments
** Hormones can bite me.
** The world needs a lot less know-it-all's and a lot more chill pills.
** Sometimes it's just easier to pretend like my…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 28, 2013 at 9:20pm — No Comments
** It should at least count as working out if you wore your workout clothes all day long.
** When you wake up at 4 AM and think you smell someone making toast, it's most likely just wishful thinking.…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 21, 2013 at 6:08pm — No Comments
** The revolving door of kids, dirt, and craziness must mean it's FINALLY Summer.
** Moms should get a cut of all lemonade stand profits.
** And somebody totally…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 14, 2013 at 7:06pm — No Comments
** I don't know where I am or what I'm supposed to be doing.
** Insomnia wants to be my BFF.
** My kids have mentally checked out for the summer, which will make the…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 31, 2013 at 3:07pm — No Comments