My Funny Mummy's Blog – November 2012 Archive (9)

Chunder Storm

Nothing says 'Welcome To Our Home' like a vomit spattered front door step.

www.myfunnymummy.org

Added by My Funny Mummy on November 30, 2012 at 3:57pm — No Comments

Parents Evening

Within it sat photos of Boo looking cute (tell me something I don't know), documents about activities planned for her (yeah, yeah, yeah), post-it notes observing The Poop at play (big wow) and work samples (yadda, yadda, yadda).

Where are the assessments?

Where do I find out that she is a genius? A prodigy? An infant mastermind? A veritable whizz kid? A shiningly gifted example of intellectual brilliance, destined only for glory, excellence and superiority?…

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Added by My Funny Mummy on November 26, 2012 at 5:56am — No Comments

Parents Evening

Within it sat photos of Boo looking cute (tell me something I don't know), documents about activities planned for her (yeah, yeah, yeah), post-it notes observing The Poop at play (big wow) and work samples (yadda, yadda, yadda).

Where are the assessments?

Where do I find out that she is a genius? A prodigy? An infant mastermind? A veritable whizz kid? A shiningly gifted example of intellectual brilliance, destined only for glory, excellence and superiority?…

Continue

Added by My Funny Mummy on November 26, 2012 at 5:56am — No Comments

Save Our Soles

My insatiable penchant for quality children's footwear knows no bounds. It cares not for pay day, savings or our desire to eat for the rest of the month. It just presses ahead, snatching at the nearest available overdraft, credit card or property re-mortgage in order to purchase every perfectly fitting 3.5G mule in the land. I am utterly powerless to control it. And if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.

www.myfunnymummy.org…

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Added by My Funny Mummy on November 25, 2012 at 4:44am — No Comments

Torment

Not in our house. Because in our house, we don't celebrate the little triumphs. There are no pats on the back or celebratory high fives. In our house, success is an opportunity to bully. To tease. To tempt. To harass, badger, provoke, goad, bait and bother. Achievement sign posts the opportunity to immediately focus on the next thing I can't do. Because now I can walk; I have to walk further. I have to manage one more step than last time; one more stride than before; one more pace…

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Added by My Funny Mummy on November 18, 2012 at 3:41pm — No Comments

Shoe In The Road

A single glove in the road - easily explained. A pair of shoes - sure, there could be reasons.
But a solitary brogue? On a dual carriage-way? Or, on occasion, on A MOTORWAY?
Nah. I don't get it.
www.myfunnymummy.org x

Added by My Funny Mummy on November 16, 2012 at 6:06pm — No Comments

Art Attack

Last Monday we turned up, berets, palettes and hard faces at the ready, and managed to shove our way through the vision-less, cack handed, toddling bunch of artistic dead beats milling around the nursery door.
Full post www.myfunnymummy.org x

Added by My Funny Mummy on November 12, 2012 at 9:36am — No Comments

The Holiday

On this holiday, I always knew the time. It was lunch time, or suncream time or flick sand in my face time. It was supper time or bath time or drink a mouthful of sea water time. It was be sick on your new holiday dress time or eat shells time or learn not only to walk but ACTUALLY RUN while on the edge of a cliff time.

Only when I got home and discovered it had been national 'Give Your Mum A Heart Attack Week' did everything fall into place. The week I booked a…

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Added by My Funny Mummy on November 6, 2012 at 3:30am — No Comments

Beach

Sand is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. But you know this. In fact, so all consuming is my fascination with this sedimentary sensation, Mum and Dad threw me on a cramped, stuffy, budget airline flight for four and a half hours to indulge my gritty interest further. And while their purse strings didn't stretch to transport suitable for those in possession of limbs, their valiant endeavours resulted in me spending a whole week on a 'beach'.…

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Added by My Funny Mummy on November 4, 2012 at 2:36pm — No Comments

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