Jennifer Marshall's Blog (292)

Let's Talk About Sex, Baby

funny,genious,humor,humour,parody,words-5474b6a1f4d073fe67f6124ed1a0123c_h

I honestly don't know where the time has gone, but apparently, I blinked, and my kids are old enough to have the "sex talk" in school.  I know -- crazy, right??!!!!  Yep, the wonder of the ol' reproductive system has currently been the hot topic of fifth grade…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on March 6, 2014 at 10:03am — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

funny-mom-quotes3

** The noise in my house is often so LOUD that I could walk out and nobody would even notice.

** It would be AWESOME to still get care packages every now and then like we did in college.…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 28, 2014 at 1:30pm — No Comments

WTH, ABC Family??!!

My kids have always LOVED commercials.  Maybe it's because their dad works in advertising, or maybe it's because, unlike me, they never ever get tired of hearing the "Flipeez" theme song that seems to play on repeat between shows.  Whatever the case, when an ad pops up on the screen, my twins are completely riveted.  So when a totally inappropriate commercial was shown during a KID movie on…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 25, 2014 at 11:12am — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

new-math-funny-equations-of-life

** I wish my brain shut off as easily when I try to go to sleep as it does when I try to help my kids with their homework.

** Exhaustion is just NOT a good look on me.…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 21, 2014 at 9:59am — No Comments

Something's Gotta Give

funny-dirty-laundry

As a parent, we're often so used to running on autopilot that we rarely ever even stop to think about why we're doing something.  We just continue to do it mindlessly, day after day after day.  Take, for instance, the gazillion and one loads of never-ending laundry and the gazillion and one loads of multiplying…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 19, 2014 at 10:29am — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

love-last-minute-plans-dating-valentines-day-ecards-someecards

** If I held my breath for a big Valentine's Day surprise, I'd surely end up dead.

** A pre-shower naked dance is evidently becoming a nightly ritual around here.…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 14, 2014 at 10:16am — No Comments

Google Is My Copilot

1348887690102_9077448

Remember that show, "Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?"  Well, it turns out, I'm apparently not.  You see, I happen to live with two of them, and I'm reminded of that fact nearly every friggin' night when I try to help them with their homework -- I swear we never learned ANY of this stuff until high…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 12, 2014 at 2:38pm — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

MjAxMy1lYzhmZjI4ZjkyOTkwMjg4

** Snowblowers are the roosters of my neighborhood.

** Joe…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 7, 2014 at 8:07pm — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

mM4B7pmother-wine-drink-kids-moms-ecards-someecards

** Whoever sent the Polar Vortex an invitation to return is in need of a good ass kicking.

** If I wanted to live in Antarctica, I would've moved to Antarctica.…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 31, 2014 at 1:38pm — No Comments

Suck It, Mother Nature

wire hangers

I'd always thought that Mother Nature and I kind of had a connection -- you know with the whole "mother" thing and all.  But I'm really starting to think that she's falsely assumed her title because no mama in her right mind would make it so damn cold outside that kids are off school and trapped indoors for days on…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 29, 2014 at 10:20am — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

Rottenecards_3483015_8748f73dqn

** If I looked like David Beckham, I'd be naked ALL the time.

** I'm a firm Belieber that Justin needs a big ol' time…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 24, 2014 at 10:21am — No Comments

Adults Behaving Badly

Unknown

Unfortunately, we hear on the news all the time about parents full-out losing their shit on the sidelines of their kids' sporting events.  A bad call can somehow turn supposed "adults" into the biggest meatheads on the planet.  It's both despicable and embarrassing. And I thought I'd seen some pretty horrific behavior…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 23, 2014 at 10:50am — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

Rottenecards_701377100_3xzbsvg86n

** Supervising a chain gang would be more enjoyable than supervising homework.

** The world needs a whole lot more Tina Fey & Amy Poehler.

** My…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 17, 2014 at 10:49pm — 1 Comment

Appreciating the Aha

aha

I've always believed that everything happens for a reason.  And though we often don't ever know the reason, sometimes, we get lucky enough to find out just why things happen the way that they do.  I LOVE those little "aha" moments.  They help to restore my faith and to reassure me that something greater IS actually in…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 15, 2014 at 1:11pm — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

life-quotes-02_large

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

** Cancer is a giant, life-stealing asshole.

**…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 10, 2014 at 5:19pm — No Comments

A Polar Vortex Punch of Reality

6a0133f03a1e37970b01a51070ca81970c-800wi

Coming back from a family vacation is never a fun thing.  The packing, the travel, the crabby kids -- they all add up to one giant pain in the ass.  It pretty much makes you forget that you were even on vacation at all.  But this recent sucker punch back to reality after our New Year's trip to…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 9, 2014 at 11:30am — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

Rottenecards_7458781_4ynnx7cztr

** Next year, I really need some elves, dammit.

** My twins now have nicer phones than I do.  Thanks, Santa.

** Candlelight church services with kids make…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on December 27, 2013 at 12:21pm — No Comments

'Twas the Nucking Futty Night Before Christmas

Some of you may remember this post from a few years ago, and some of you may be reading it for the first time.  Whatever the case, it was my own nucking futty spin on the classic tale of "The Night Before Christmas".  If your holidays are anything like mine, you'll appreciate the recounting of a Christmas Eve that's not exactly what you might call picture-perfect.…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on December 24, 2013 at 11:16am — No Comments

Things I've Learned This Week

Rottenecards_44742983_9csb6dnj4g

** Whoever declared the recorder a "musical" instrument was obviously deaf.

** The UPS man has left more on my porch lately than the squirrels have.…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on December 20, 2013 at 8:00pm — No Comments

Texting with the Shorties

14594978_WelcomeToTheFuture_03112013Final1

As a parent, technology is often my worst enemy.  Not only does it turn my son into a zombified video game addict half the time, but it also gives me gray hairs worrying about the prospect of someone sending a damn naked picture to one of my middle schoolers.  (*Gasp!!!*)  However, I'm starting to…

Continue

Added by Jennifer Marshall on December 18, 2013 at 12:12pm — No Comments

Blog Topics by Tags

Monthly Archives

2014

2013

2012

2011

12/22/14 DAILY BLOG PROMPT

A SPECIAL GREETING FROM FRAN DRESCHER

MOM BLOGGERS FOR SOCIAL GOOD

Mom Bloggers for Social Good is a global coalition of 2000+ mom bloggers who currently span over twenty countries and who care about spreading the good news about the amazing work non-profit organizations and NGOs are doing around the world.  Want to make a difference? Please join us!

Toxic Free Blog - by Brittany Glynn


Brittany is a director of the Toxic Free Foundation and created the first ever Toxic Free Certification Program.  Weekly, Brittany publishes the Toxic Free Blog and provides coaching to over 10,000 families in the United States alone.  She is the author of a Toxic Free educational series and co-author of several Toxic Free learning programs. Brittany is also an award winning author. 

© 2014   Created by Mom Bloggers Club.

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service