It's amazing to me how Goatdog and I can have such differing opinions of the UPS man. We're talking complete opposite ends of the spectrum, people. I just so happen to LOVE a visit from the man in brown. I mean, he brings me wine and shoes and sassy new dresses -- what girl wouldn't love that??! Goatdog,…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on June 6, 2013 at 11:43pm — No Comments
** I don't know where I am or what I'm supposed to be doing.
** Insomnia wants to be my BFF.
** My kids have mentally checked out for the summer, which will make the…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 31, 2013 at 3:07pm — No Comments
** Surprisingly, a quiet house kinda creeps me out.
** Mother Nature is a ruthless Bitch with a capital "B".
** "The Great Gatsby" was unfortunately not all that great.
** I would get lost inside a cardboard box. (No, seriously, how do I get out of this thing?)
** Grown men fighting in a bar is the…Continue
** Mother's Day should really be Mother's Weekend.
** My brain is on MAJOR end-of-the-school-year overload.
** Warm weather just makes ya wanna eat ice…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 17, 2013 at 10:43am — No Comments
I don't know whether I've lost my mind or if my ovaries are bored, but lately, I've had both babies AND puppies on the brain. Now I know that deep down, I don't REALLY want to go back to that whole beginning stage of sleep deprivation and cleaning up poo every ten minutes. But, that certainly hasn't stopped me from obsessing…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 16, 2013 at 6:24pm — No Comments
** Cramps and mammograms are just two of the many perks (*ahem*) of being a woman.
** I'd rather be a wrinkled mess than pull out an iron.
** Kids and husbands have very selective hearing.
** Getting in bed early to read a book didn't kill me after all.
** Paying your offspring to do things you don't wanna…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 10, 2013 at 2:30pm — No Comments
Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 4, 2013 at 12:08am — No Comments
Added by Jennifer Marshall on May 2, 2013 at 1:19pm — No Comments
** My son isn't afraid to run a song straight into the ground.
** Neither time nor cheese is on my side.
** If answering questions was a high-paying job, I'd be…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 26, 2013 at 5:46pm — No Comments
Goatdog continues to amaze me with the ridiculously crazy things he chooses to eat. Lately, he's munched on everything from aluminum foil to snotty Kleenex's. The more…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 25, 2013 at 1:48pm — No Comments
** Spilled wine is WAY worse than spilled milk.
** The DMV is truly a vast sea of weirdness.
** Turning 29 again wasn't so bad after…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 19, 2013 at 2:31pm — No Comments
It's hard to believe that ten whole years have passed since I was squeezing my legs together like a freaking vice so my twins wouldn't be born on my birthday. Yep, call me crazy, but I did NOT wanna have to share the same b-day as my kiddos. I mean, seriously, moms get so few days of recognition as it is!…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 17, 2013 at 12:14pm — No Comments
** The longer you watch t.v. at night, the stupider the commercials get.
** North Korea needs a giant chill pill.
** I seriously hate…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 12, 2013 at 2:35pm — No Comments
Birds do it. Bees do it. And God knows WE sure do it. But unfortunately for me, it looks like I'm gonna have to talk…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 10, 2013 at 10:48am — No Comments
** Family trips are flat-out EXHAUSTING.
** It takes 11 years to unpack 11 days worth of luggage.
** Reality's a bitch, especially when it sucker punches…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on April 5, 2013 at 1:00pm — No Comments
** Shamrock Shakes are 600+ calories of awesomeness.
** "Quiet" is most definitely NOT a word I'd use to describe my house.
** My son has apparently given up sleep for Lent. Lucky me.
** Sometimes when people say they don't need help, it's cause they're too overwhelmed to see that they do.
** Kids' ear…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on March 23, 2013 at 10:26am — No Comments
** Daylight Savings is clearly one of Satan's brilliant ideas.
** Me sitting on the toilet is evidently an open invitation for a party in the bathroom.
** The white crusty stuff around the top of the milk carton is seriously nasty.
** A bouquet of balloons always sounds like a good idea until you try to get them into the…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on March 15, 2013 at 6:29pm — No Comments
** I most certainly did NOT inherit my mom's hair-braiding skills.
** Apparently, Gap Kids sells husky-sized skinny jeans. Anybody else confused?
** Winter can kiss…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on March 8, 2013 at 9:00pm — No Comments
** Shoveling snow by hand should be followed by a massage. And possibly a lobotomy.
** The past several days have been like tantric sex. Minus the sex part.Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on March 1, 2013 at 5:30pm — No Comments
EVERYBODY NEEDS A CO-PILOT.Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 28, 2013 at 2:32pm — No Comments