My heart is heavy with sorrow. For an award show junkie like myself it's hard to even act like a normal person in the face of such tragedies. Angelina was nominated. Now I'm not going to get to see her in all her glory with Brad wrapped around her like a second skin. Or Johnny. Honey, I forgive you for Sweeney, really I do. Ellen Page got a nod and she's a hometown girl to boot, and we may never see her there again (but I'm hoping she will because she's so great and Juno was my favorite movie of the year), but I wanted to see if she could hold her own with the big boys and now I'll never know. The tears and sorrow. I heard they found her at the Chanhassen Dinner Theater. I'm signing my kids up tomorrow. Then Rumor Willis whatever are you going to do now that you can be Miss Golden Globe? It was your coming out party. Tragic.
I totally sympathize with the writers, really, I do. Will someone please give them some money? Enough is enough. They deserve it and while your at it could you just please up the columnist fee a bit, too? It's hard to live off pennies. I keep wondering why the Bigwigs would rather loose the money than pay the writers? It just doesn't make any sense.
I'm picturing a nervous agent on the phone with his Bigwig (they have to have agents, right? Everyone in Hollywood does) "Umm, yeah, Mr. Spielberg, we gotta hold out here for a few more days at the very least. Those suckers ain't gonna get a dime from us! I say we flush the 7 billion dollars down the pipes instead of forking it over for the next 35 years to those suckers. Who cares if people cry because they love Chuck and they can't watch him any more. Sound good?" He quickly hangs up the phone and mops his brow. Whew, that was a close one.
It makes no sense.
Back to the Globes. Or rather, back to the not Globes. Cate Blanchett and George Clooney were nominated as per usual. Along with Philip Seymour Hoffman and Ryan Gosling. I really wanted to see Lars and the Real Girl but I haven't yet. Daniel Day-Lewis has made his comeback. I thought he was dead, so it's good to see him, I guess. Julia is up again this time for Charlie Wilson's War. I love Julia. I just do. I wish we could have play dates at her ranch in Taos. I'd bring my fun swirly margarita glasses and try not to stare overmuch.
I'm going to have to tune in tonight and see how the "Announcement" goes, which is how they're billing the night: Golden Globe Awards Announcement. They say they have interviews with stars, which you can do without upsetting the picket line. Invisible air wrote the questions for them.
. . . Okay, so I went to watch the dumb announcements and to my befuddlement I got Billy Bush instead. Huh? Can I at least have an official looking suit and tie there with the envelopes and a drummer boy positioned in the corner? I like my fake awards to look important. I guess that was too much to ask. Not only that, but my kids wanted to watch the Amazing Race, which is our Sunday night laundry fave and I think I missed the interviews. I thought the interviews went with the suit and tie envelope openers? I was thwarted on every side. It just wasn't meant to be.
I bet Ellen Page is crying in her soup. I know I would be.
I'm not sure what was worse, having to watch Billy Yucky Bush unemotionally read the winners or having him give his opinion after the dirty deeds were done. TV viewing at it's worst, I have to say. And then all these weird people won and nobody, except Johnny naturally, won anything. I'm sorry but Charlie Wilson's War was up for a comedy or a musical?
Ratatouille is the only thing that made sense in the whole wide show. Really.
I'm already pining for next year. I have my dress picked out and everything. I want another Lord of the Rings to be made. Can someone arrange that for me? And it's beyond time for Leo and Johnny to get together and I'm not talking about a Gilbert Grape, I'm talking about oily skin and loin cloths. Maybe a Lord of the Pirates. So what if it's been done to death. I love pirates. Julia and I can watch it together in her new screening room.