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How Do I Choose the Best Professional Cleaning Service

Keeping your home clean can be an exhausting task, especially if you have to squeeze it in between the chaos and work and keeping your family in line. And if your life feels like it’s nothing but cleaning and tedious chores, perhaps it’s…

How to Keep Your Pool Clean Without Using Chemicals

The weather is getting hotter and hotter, and if you haven’t done it already, you are probably getting ready to open your pool and start the swimming season. Having a pool in your backyard is wonderful, but it requires quite some effort before you…

8 Ways to Make Food Shopping as a Parent More Bearable

No one is denying children aren’t the gift that keep on giving. But, as a parent, there are just some tasks in day to day adult life that shouldn’t be accompanied by kids. Namely the weekly food shop. Opening yourself up to a world of whining, potential tantrums and…

All They Need to Know, They'll Learn from 90210

http://dailyquestionablechoices.wordpress.com/

All They Need to Know, They’ll Learn From 90210

 ON JANUARY 19, 2013

Don’t be fooled by these blonde locks, I have been highlighting my hair since I was in seventh grade. I really couldn’t even tell you what my real hair color should be. Here is my best guess: If you head out to your local drug store and walk down the aisle with boxes of hair color, take a look at “Blahhh” or “Meh” that would be the best description of my natural color.

Since I have been cursed with such lackluster hair, I have been forced to shell out big money every few months to make sure I remain a bouncy blonde and not some crazy lady pretending that her six inches of dark roots is her attempt at ombre.

Don't Care

In fact, when I am super stressed and life gets a little sad, I am a firm believer that blonder is better. So if you see me and I am totally bleached out, give me a little sympathy, maybe a gentle pat on the back because I am one meltdown from dropping my bucket.

A young gal was highlighting my hair this week and she was over sharing stories of her “bad boy” and “womanizing” boyfriend. I patiently listened to her story, nodded periodically, and even gave the shocked “No!” every so often. When she finished the sordid details of her love life, I decided to pass down some sage wisdom from a slightly older, wiser, been-there-done-that-lady. Here is what I told her:

“Honey, you date the Dylan, but you marry the Brandon.”

Brandon and Dylan

I knew I was in trouble when she got this dumfounded look that screamed “What the hell are you talking about?” Then I got the “Who?”

“Dylan McKay and Brandon Walsh? 90210? The real 90210. Only one of the greatest shows ever! Really? No idea who I am talking about?

First I felt old. Then I felt sad for the wayward young girl that didn’t have 90210 during her formative years to guide her along her journey to maturity.  So then I got to thinking about Monkey and Mimi and all of the conversations I will have with them in the future and I shudder at the thought. What if I just lock the kids in a room and force them to watch all ten seasons of my favorite show? When they are done, they can come out and we can discuss what they have learned. I am confident all of those difficult conversations will be addressed in each hour of 90210, and I will simply just need to reiterate some of the most important:

  1. Don’t get drunk at prom and pass out in front of the principal. While I am sure you are charming, no one is going to stage a walkout and chant “Mimi graduates, Mimi graduates.”
  2. Don’t wear the same dress to the spring formal as your best friend, don’t date the edgy new girl that takes drugs, don’t dress Kelly and Brendaslutty at Halloween parties, don’t date the broken hottie that has mommy issues, and don’t lose your virginity at the spring formal you wore the same dress as your friend—for reasons other than you are wearing the same dress as your BFF—Didn’t you learn anything from Brenda’s pregnancy scare?
  3. Just because your friends have bigger houses, amazing clothes, a bitchin car, tons of money, and the super, cool, fun mom that is sometimes in and out of rehab, the grass is not always greener and your friends probably wish they had a snarky, sarcastic Mom like yours that can make a mean pepperoni roll. Boom!
  4. Drugs are bad. So are diet pills, cults, gambling,  plagiarizing your college papers,  cheating on your girlfriend with her BFF, cheating on your boyfriend with his BFF, cheating on your girlfriend with a lame music executive—OK, let’s just generalize that with cheating—it’s bad –all bad.
  5. Violence against a woman is never OK, and if some guy pushes you down the stairs, he does not love you. While I do not condone violence, I would kick a guy’s ass if he ever laid a finger on my Mimi.
  6. When faced with two options and neither feels right, always choose yourself. While she made lots of bad choices during the course of the show, Kelly got this one right—“I choose me!”

So there you go. Six very important lessons that cover all things I need my children to know as they grow up to be functioning members of society.  Man, this child rearing is easy! While the girl that colored my hair missed out, Monkey and Mimi will be ready to face the world and know a little more about terrible 90′s fashion.

Bad Fashion

Believe me, I know. I dated the Dylans but I married the Brandon, and I am one smart and lucky lady.

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Comment by Amanda Mushro on January 19, 2013 at 2:26pm

Yes! As a freshman, she is ready for all of 90210 in its glory! Perfect age! So glad you liked the blog :)

Amanda

Comment by Ann Harrison on January 19, 2013 at 1:49pm

Yay!!!  Oh my gosh, you have me laughing!!!

I'm a fellow 90210 fan and this list is great.  I need to get my freshman daughter schooled in 90210 knowledge.  I do believe it's time.  :->  

I need to head over to your blog now!

~Ann Harrison

 http://www.annagainandagain.com/

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