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Am I Really Running Out of Q-Tips De-Clogging My Ears From all the Political Debates?

Put a fork in me – I am done people! It’s not that I don’t care about the future of this great nation. I do care. It’s not that I haven’t watched all the debates. I have viewed each one. But enough already. How many times can a person listen to the same answers over and over again? It’s time to get this show on the road and vote already so I won’t have any more interruptions to my Modern Family episodes.
This is not about which side of the fence you are on, not at all. Both parties make valid points, and they both talk a little baloney too.
The call for a “cease-debate” is more about this: You know when you argue with your kids to put away their toys and they say, “I did.” And then you say, “No you didn’t, they are still all over the floor.” And then they say, “Well I put those toys away.” And then you say, “I asked you to put all the toys away.” And then they say, “You never said put all they toys away. You said put your toys away. And I did put my toys away.” At this point you start to raise your voice and express you don’t care for the attitude. This is usually overlapped by some sarcastic eye rolling and an observation about the other’s diminished skill set. There is a lot of denying and usually a “fact checker” (a.k.a. dad, grandma, or stool pigeon sibling) is called upon to corroborate the story.
Yeah, so that is basically how the debates have been going. Lucky for us, the last one was Monday.
There is one person who cannot get enough of it all. My dad. He toggles between, CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News like a sports junkie trying to watch all playoff games at the same time. If DIRECTV created a political version of the NFL Sunday Ticket, my dad would buy it. Especially if Bill O’Reilly refereed. I’ve never seen anything like it. What does he think he is going to miss? A fifth body language professional from Topeka, Kansas who specializes in eye twitches and head nods?
While I know he is not alone in his 2012 election obsession, that’s enough debate re-hashing for me. I actually miss the news discussing whether or not the current administration is doing a crap job with oil and gas prices. I want the good ole’ days of ridiculous situations, such as when the Secret Service agents were caught with Colombian hookers. I’d even take the “breaking story” about how people were stealing life-size David Hasselhoff posters from Cumberland Farms.
So if you are with me, take a deep breath, get your rear out there and vote early. Then sit back with a cold one and watch the political tide roll in.
Or click over to TNT because seriously, even watching re-runs of The Mentalist is better than listening to a moderator say, “You’ll have your turn for rebuttal” …again.

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