1 You have searched me, LORD,
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you, LORD, know it completely.
5 You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.
Everyone is already thinking of things to change, renew, or try as the beginning of the new year rolls around. Resolutions to quit smoking, yelling, lose more weight, and so on. After reading Psalm 139, I wonder how many of us are resolving to spend more time with God this year? With the ever increasing technology and media, it's any wonder that any of us are feeling close in His presence. As a mother, distractions, to-do lists, quality time, chores, pull us in 1000 different directions. How can we expect our children to grow up and love God if we are not the Heart of the home? Meaning, if our hearts aren't centered on Him, what should we expect from our little ones?
Recently for me I've felt so distant from God. I haven't sensed His presence in awhile, nor have I heard His voice. Feeling empty and discouraged, my eyes came to rest on Psalm 139. Though I can't find God, He knows where I am. Though I hardly think of Him, His thoughts of me are too many to count. He knows all my ways and yet I barely know Him. Instead of walking away from me, God insisted on reminding me that though I feel empty, unmotivated, and tired, He is still with me. Such knowledge is too wonderful...don't you think?
Doing a mental checklist of why I feel so distant, I'm making it my resolution this year to spend time with God instead of chasing after friendships, completing daily to-do lists, and volunteering to be on committee's; I'm choosing to spend time in God's word. I'm choosing to write in my prayer journal, and I'm looking to find Him in the moments that I spend with my family. What am I giving up? Not too much, just the t.v. at nap time and in the evenings, not to mention surfing the computer, or checking the latest up to date happenings on my phone. It will probably be more of a shock to my system than I anticipate, but it will be worth it. I'd rather chase after a God who is described in Psalms 139 than any other worldly thing that will only be here for the moment. I'd rather try and give it all that I've got instead of just going through the motions which seems to be what so many Christians are doing these days.
It scares me to see how complacent fellow friends have become. I see women more concerned about climbing the social ladder to be the leader of next year's school fundraiser. I see women more concerned about their to-do lists than focusing on their kids. I see still others more focused on popularity instead of pouring themselves in the relationships that God wants them to. They are all losing sight and losing out on what God has originally in store for them, but most of all, they are missing out on His presence. Each woman prays about what she is doing, and where she is going hoping to have God's blessings; indeed she does have God's permissive blessings but not His perfect will in her life. I look at them and what I admire so much and then weigh it against the God of Psalm 139...and I want more, not just His permissive will to keep my life busy and seemingly full filled; I want His perfect will and His presence. I want to stand before Him knowing that I've chased Him as much as He has chased me. I'm ringing in the new year by stripping off the old complacent me and praying that He ignites my heart for more.
On a side note: For those of you in the Mid West area, My Bride Radio just announced they are going to commit to learning scripture and blog about each of the verses. Stay tuned as I bring this opportunity to you as well. You can visit My Bridge at http://www.mybridgeradio.net/home