One son living off formula and on a feeding tube and another son with hearing aids - this could’ve been me.  But it’s not.  Instead, I have a son who’s healthy and thriving and another who hears fine.  Where we lucky?  Did God simply smile done at us?  Yes.  But I also know that my approach to their medical challenges made a world of difference.

 

What’s this approach?  It’s a combination of two things:  attitude and know how.

 

1.    Attitude:

 

“But Doctor, isn’t there anything I can do to help Ethan overcome his allergies?” I ask in earnest. 

“The most you can do is to just stay away from these foods- the less exposure the better.  You never know what happens when he is exposed to an allergen.  He could die.” - my doctor states with authority.

 

  .  .  .

 

“But Doctor, I’m telling you, I know Alex can hear.” I emphasize repeatedly and in earnest.

“In time you’ll come to accept this diagnosis.  This test is not wrong.  Think how lucky he is to be able to catch this severe hearing loss so early.” My Doctor tries to explain patiently, yet again.

 

Are you kidding me?  Ethan could die? Alex has a severe hearing issue?  This was a reality that was unacceptable and did not ring true to me.  In my gut I knew there had to be another way around Ethan’s allergies and I knew that Alex could hear.  This was a vision I had to hold on to.

 

2.    Know How:

 

But having the right attitude and trusting our gut is only one piece of the puzzle.   Now what?

 

Know in your life that the most important thing you can do is to question.  Question everyone.  The nurse, the doctor, your friends, your neighbors- ask the same questions from everyone.  Ask new questions that others raise.   Ask questions that you think may be irrelevant.  But ask them anyway.  Ask until you are satisfied.

 

And always have an open mind.  You have to know that in 100 years from now medicine as we know it will be considered backwards.  We’ve only begun to scratch the surface of understanding the human body.  Be open to ideas that are not yet tested or proven.  Be open to trying all kinds of remedies.  Work with your doctor, who has a significant body of knowledge but don’t be limited by what your doctor knows.

 

I wrote Little Patient Big Doctor: One Mother’s Journey and I speak to groups because I know that my experience rings true and can make a real impact in the lives of those who hear it.  We create our reality and we have a significant say in our health.  Speak up and Thrive. 

 

 

Haleh Rabizadeh Resnick is a Speaker, Attorney, Teacher and Author of Little Patient Big Doctor: One Mother’s Journey

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Tags: allergy, attitude, child, children, communication, doctor, health, hearing, mom, support

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