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How Do I Choose the Best Professional Cleaning Service

Keeping your home clean can be an exhausting task, especially if you have to squeeze it in between the chaos and work and keeping your family in line. And if your life feels like it’s nothing but cleaning and tedious chores, perhaps it’s…

How to Keep Your Pool Clean Without Using Chemicals

The weather is getting hotter and hotter, and if you haven’t done it already, you are probably getting ready to open your pool and start the swimming season. Having a pool in your backyard is wonderful, but it requires quite some effort before you…

8 Ways to Make Food Shopping as a Parent More Bearable

No one is denying children aren’t the gift that keep on giving. But, as a parent, there are just some tasks in day to day adult life that shouldn’t be accompanied by kids. Namely the weekly food shop. Opening yourself up to a world of whining, potential tantrums and…

Happy Anniversary of my 32nd Birthday!

I adore being in my thirties.

To be honest I appreciate my birthday a little bit more every year. It’s not a huge deal to me per say but I’m happy that my mom brought me in to this world. My birthday falls either on or around Mother’s Day which has waaaaaay more significance to me.

I do like when the the days are spanned out so I can milk it a little bit longer.

Why yes I take advantage of it, wouldn’t you?

I don’t mind being spoiled.

I do a helluva lot and I deserve a damn break, some pampering here and there and I won’t apologize for it.

I homeschool therefore I am with the boy 24/7, cooking food, cleaning up after dirty boys, chauffeuring the boy to activities and field trips, cleaning up puke and the aftermath splatters, killing alien spiders, decoupaging fuzzy butts junk, explaining things to the boy that I don’t want to and now we both need shock therapy, dealing with crazy meth neighbors SO if I want to sleep in my new Coach shoes and bag I will AND I want to be petted!

The jewelry industry (when Phil was in it) killed the joy of my birthday and Mother’s Day for far too long. Zales, Kays and Friedmans (now bankrupt) can SUCK IT!

I’m taking it back and I don’t want your diamond heart pendant that looks like lopsided boobies Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman! I want a glass of wine and mommy porn (50 Shades of Grey).

By now you are wondering what I’m loving

well

Myself

Funny Birthday Ecard: I find it hard to believe your entire body was in a uterus at one point.

Funny Mother's Day Ecard: May your mom not be too busy pleasuring herself to Fifty Shades of Grey to celebrate Mother's Day with you.

 

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