The Boy is about to turn 12. I’m baffled as to how that happened. I can’t possibly be old enough to have a 12 year old. Of course, a birthday means a birthday party. Always chaotic, stressful, & expensive. His birthday falls on Thursday this year, but of course, being a school day, the plan would be to have it on the following Saturday. Certainly that was HIS plan. However, being the nasty, rotten bitch of a mother that I am, I nixed that plan outright. And since the Sunday is Father’s Day, I also nixed that, mostly because any kids I invited would likely have family plans. I know exactly what you’re thinking….WTF bitch? Why the hell??! Are you so selfish as to deny your child their rightful celebration just so you can have your Saturday? Or did you (gasp!) FORGET & busy yourself with other things until it was either too late to plan it or, worse, booked with something MORE important than your child’s birthday?? Yes & no….selfish? never…forget? far too often, but not this time….poor planning?? Absofrikkinlutley. Booked with something JUST AS important as my child’s birthday?? Yep. How’s THIS for an excuse….my OTHER child’s birthday. That‘s right people…I was dumb enough to give birth five years & TWO DAYS apart.