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We have been having a really bad 2 months with my son who is 5. We have been very much against medicating him because we fear side-effects and the fact that there just isn't enough research out there to tell me that there will not be damage to his brain/body long-term. I could never forgive myself if I gave him the medicine and then something awful happened to him that was irreversible.

We have started him on some vitamin supplements that were recommended to us by and expert in autism (although my son does not have an autism diagnosis) that suggested this combination may help be a calmative for him. It has only been 3 days since I've been giving him these. So I know it will take time to get into his system before we may see results - if we do.

As a bit of background, we have been "in the system" with pyschologists and wrap-around services with behavior therapists since he was 3. This past December the insurance company which pays for the TSS help decided that he needed to cut his hours back because they felt he wasn't getting any help from the services. The pre-K program/daycare he was in decided that after the Christmas break my son was not to return. We have nowhere else to send him so we had to pay a person to come to our house 3 days a week and care for him. It is financially draining.

He is just so aggressive and disobedient lately - you say no and he says I'm gonna do it, not matter what the consequences are for him. We have tried every tactic - timeouts, reward charts, spankings, removal of favorite items, special desserts, etc. He just doesn't care. He says things like, spank me if you want to, or no matter, or whatever.
We tried ingnoring him but then that just escalades the tantrums into more of frenzy where he thens tries throwing or tipping items of furniture over (oh did I mention that he has had super-human strength since conception?).

Lately, he could be pretty good all day but then the moment his dad and sister get home he starts going nuts.

So, we have been battling ourselves again with the medication idea. He will be going to kindergarten this year. We don't know what to do because he will never be able to sit in a classroom all day at a regular school. There is a really good therapeutic school that we could possiblly get him into but would he need that if we medicated him, we just don't know what direction to go.

Our hearts are being ripped apart and physically/mentally we are exhausted from the stress of keeping him safe and entertained. We feel like our family is suffering at the hands of a 5 year old since we cannot do anything that a normal family can do - shopping malls, zoo, amusement parks, vacations, picnics, school functions, sports, etc. It is becoming very draining on us and our daughter.

I was wondering what those of you who medicate your children felt before you did this and what services and techniques you used before you gave up and just went for the medicine. How did you come to that inner peace about giving a child such mood/mind altering drugs? We need your advice on this to ponder and come to a decision we can live with.

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Comment by Jennifer Nordin on April 27, 2009 at 4:47pm
Hi Mia,
I would love to chat with you about how aromatherapy can help mood disorders. This month I am focusing on autism/ADD/ADHD so please check out the information on my blog. I will be adding a new post with more specific info on using essential oils later this evening. Blessings, Jen

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