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If the Magic Fairy Came to Visit me in Mommyland

My makeup bag contains one very old tube of foundation (because I only wear makeup on the rare occasions when my husband and I go out for dinner) and a few other dried up objects. I resorted to cutting my own hair when Mirabelle was a baby (because it just seemed easier than trying to work out a time when I could go to a hair salon, given she was BF and refused to ever take a bottle). Things have improved over time and I do now get my hair cut and wear clean clothes every day that are no longer stained with baby food and worse, but there are still days when I don't wash my hair and some when I don't shower either. I have three pairs of jeans - all with the now famous "Mommy cleans the floor so often her jeans have knee holes" and in the winter every day I wear one of them. If we are spending the day at home the jeans are topped with an old T-shirt and sweatshirt. If we are going out they are topped with a slightly less old T-shirt and one of my "best" sweatshirts.

I often tell my husband that if the magic fairy were to visit and grant me just one wish I would it thus: I would be able to wake up every morning, roll out of bed, click my fingers and be magically transformed into a well dressed woman wearing clean, expertly ironed clothing, already showered and slathered in skin preserving creams and potions, perfumed, hair immaculate, makeup subtle yet expertly applied and (maybe pushing my luck here) the bed made and the bathroom clean and tidy. My husband thinks that is a terrible waste of a magic wish (assuming such things existed which I know in reality they do not - honest, I do really, I've not gone quite that crazy, at least not yet). His exact words when I say this being "are you CRAZY, anyone in their right mind would just wish for millions of dollars!"

I however think that would be the very best use of a wish any Mom could ever imagine. Think of it - all those extra minutes you'd get in bed in the morning, not having to scramble out ahead of the "MOMMY WAKE UP, COME AND GET ME RIGHT NOW" cries that greet me when Mirabelle wakes up with the dawn (how I wish it would stay dark until at least 7am every morning of the year). You'd never have to go and get another hair cut so all those hours and expense you can spend on something else. You'd save time not making your bed or having to clean up a ravaged bathroom. You'd save aeons of time not having to wash and iron your clothes (I envisage when you throw something into the clothes hamper it magically overnight transports itself, cleaned and ironed, back onto a hangar in your closet). You'd not have to spend money you can't afford on expensive creams to iron out those wrinkes, none of which work because if they did they would cost even more money than they actually do as EVERYONE would be buying them. You'd have all these wonderful makeup aids that would mask every line and - I was going to say wrinkle but at this stage we're really talking great big cracks - and make you look the best you can possibly be. All of this of course would mean the following: It is the beginning of the day, you feel good about yourself and life and ready (or almost ready - I forgot to include in my wish a Starbucks Vente Latte waiting for me too) for the day ahead. That's priceless in my book.

Yes, I know it's not going to happen, but everyone has to dream!



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