My kids are driving me absolutely CUCKOO-KACHOO with all the friggin' apps they continue to want for the iPhone.  Every day it's something new.  My damn phone now has over 8,764 different games on it!  WTF?!  Ok, so maybe that's a slight exaggeration, but I seriously can't find any of the things that I need on it anymore cause it's so overcrowded with kid shit!

And we thought we'd solved this little issue by giving them our old iPhones to use like an iTouch.  However, thanks to this whole iCloud horse dung that my husband's hooked up, all the kids' crap automatically goes onto MY phone.  Awesome.  So now when I want to check the weather, I have to scroll through things like "Plants vs. Zombies" and "Justin Bieber Me" and "Plumber's Crack", which, as you can imagine, isn't at all annoying.

So one would probably assume then that with all that variety, my twins would have more than enough to entertain them, right?  Evidently, though, they are on some kind of a mission to collect every single app known to mankind before their ninth birthday next month.  They are constantly coming to me with quarters scrounged from their piggy banks and the couch cushions to buy yet another jackass new game they've discovered.  The WORST is when they wake me up at the ass crack of dawn to ask about making a purchase.  Luckily, they've since learned how very big of a mistake it is to ask Mama for ANYTHING at that insane hour of the day.  (Have I mentioned that I'm not a morning person?)

I'm more than certain that my phone's gonna explode at any given moment and tell me to go f*#k myself.  Cause surely it's on the brink of information overload.  How could it not be?  And yes, I do realize that I could put all the kid stuff into a folder to clean it all up, but I'd rather just bitch about it to you guys.  Especially since I'm way better at bitching than I am at technology.


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