I am not the author of these meanings. Credit goes to someone else.

 

 

Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

 

Feedback: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.

 

Full Name: What you call your child when you're mad at him.

 

Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.

 

Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

 

Independent: How we want our children to be for as long as they do everything we say.

 

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.

 

Show Off: A child who is more talented than yours.

 

Sterilize: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it, and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it and wiping it with saliva.

 

Top Bunk: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

 

Two-Minute Warning: When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar-grunting noises.

 

Whodunit: None of the kids that live in your house.

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