Lately, I have two types of days. A good day, and a miserable day. Today was a good day. I took a leave of absence from work to deal with what's going on in my life. Good for me and my kids, terrible for my wallet. But my routine became to wake up, take kids to school, come back home, crawl into bed and just lay there. Sometimes I would sleep away the day, escaping the misery I was feeling, other days I would just lay there crying. Nothing would get done, and I wouldn't move, wouldn't eat, wouldn't do anything, until it was time to get my kids from school. Then I was a completely different person. I was motivated, I made dinner, helped with homework, played with them, handled bath time, and then read a book to the kids before they went to bed. But then it's just me again, alone with too many horrible thoughts, memories, and pictures in my head. And so another sleepless night would begin. I'd get about 1 to 2 hours of sleep, and the cycle would start again. Rinse and repeat. I gotta admit, I had a hell of a lot more bad days than good. But today, today was a good day. I got up, took my kids to school, and actually stayed up. I made important phone calls, paid bills, ran errands, cleaned the house. I'm a little exhausted to tell you the truth, but in a completely amazing, Thank God for this day, kind of way. So yeah, today was a good day. I don't wanna come off greedy or anything, but another good day would be awesome. I mean a good week would be amazing but shit, I'll take what I can get.

Jeniel @ What's Wrong With Mommy?

Views: 8

Tags: Heartache, Mom, Mommy, Single, Survival

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