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You guessed it, it's beyond time to buy bras!!

There are a few things that I am known for, a really good lasagna, a cleft in my chin, mad dancing skillz, big Texas hair and bigger boobs! I once had a lesbian flick me on the boob and accuse me of having implants! Yeah right! If these were implants, I'd sue that surgeon and be blogging from my luxurious vacation home.

I finally decided to break down and go purchase new bras. You would think that buying brassieres would be a fairly uncomplicated task, oh think again. I began my mission by mentally preparing. Buy bras requires mental preparation on the same level as swimsuit season! Once I got my head right, I set out.

Of course the girl in the store was all of twenty and could not have weighed more than a buck twenty! Friggin perfect! How on earth would she be able to sympathize with my 35 year old, post 4 babies, big boobs gone south plight?

She showed me all my choices and in my size; let's just say it's kinda slim pickings. Off to the fitting room I plodded. I tried on bra after bra after bra after bra. I tried on so many, that my arms were scrapped raw from the enormous tags the manufacturers feel compelled to attach at the arm holes!!

After about an hour and rejecting a hundred offers from my sales clerk to get me a larger size (it COULD be a smaller size you know!) I ended up purchasing 3 new bras. And let me tell ya, these hood ornaments never looked better!

Want more foolishness, visit my BLOG

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