I was not going to blog on this topic. I was not. It has nothing to do with my family, my kids, or motherhood.
I wasn't. Really.
And then I decided to record the whole 6 or 7 episode mess and now, well now, I have a few thoughts that I must get on paper, lest they well up in me, cause indigestion, and possibly an ulcer.
No one wants that.
Even though I know the possibility of losing cherished readers is high, especially in Utah, and the backlash for my sharp tongue is inevitable, I post anyway. Because it has to be done.
What the freaking living holy heck of a mess is this crap?
Let's put aside that the man has 4 wives. I see the benefit of it. I do. There is almost no day in my life that I wish someone else could step in and help me out. Pick up the slack. Clean my house. Watch my children. In fact, I know of many, many, women who entertain the idea of sister wives because it just seems to make things easier on the woman.
I can even overlook the fact that the man, in this case, reminds me of a shady car salesman who is dealing heavy artillery out of his mobile home office. I am sure he is a very nice man, and I am not married to him so what do I care, really?
What seriously irritates me about the fact that TLC paid this family and aired their story is that it is so full of hypocrisy and double standards that I could barely keep up with the infidelity, pain, and self deprecation emitting from my screen. This show, alone, set back women's rights at least 50 years.
The excuses made for the "acceptable" practice of "courting" another wife, leaving his family home alone, a pregnant wife due any day now, small children missing their daddy, and other wives obviously hurting over his decisions, were laughable.
"This is the lifestyle you chose."
Really? I don't think you running around with a 30 year old "mid- wife" crisis is at all what these woman, who have born your 13 children, and who get to spend every 3rd night with you, is what they signed up for. In fact, if you listened - with your ears, they did not.
I found it to be utterly tasteless that he went to see the 4th wife-to-be and took his teenage daughters to "babysit" her kids so that they could go out. If you are going to "court" - or cheat as it is commonly defined - please do not drag your children into it. They are most likely confused and scared to be left, in a strange city, with kids they don't know, worried about their mother at home crying.
I also found that asking if his first wife wanted to endure in vetro - fertilization so that he could have another child one week after his new daughter was born, to be appalling. What disrespect to the mother of his latest child to be already planning another. Give her a few weeks, at least.
Maybe it is that I am too traditional. Too straight laced. Too un"evolved" as a modern woman, but I left the marathon - which I have no idea why I sat through - feeling a little dirty. A little uneasy, a little sad. And a lot infuriated.
I wish I could have seen the good in it. Believed the smiles directed at the camera. Learned something about a lifestyle I never really understood. Come away with some sort of respect and admiration for people who, despite society's standards, do what they feel is right for them and their families.
I was disappointed. Just as I am in that it even made it to TV. And that I watched it.