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This is my story. You know that “it’s coming” feeling you get at the bottom of your throat right before you vomit? Or that feeling of slow motion electricity that runs the entire length of your body as you fall in that time between the initial trip and hitting the ground? If you mix those two feelings together you will get an idea of how I existed in my  twelfth and thirteenth  year of life. 1988  was the year when my life took a turn for the fucking awful. My childhood was awesome. I had confidence and tons of self-esteem.  So it came as a pretty big shock to me when I fell into such a dark place so fast. And I had no idea how I got there. I felt so alone. I know that certain things played into my inability to stand up for myself but I really do not know why I was chosen. And I know I wasn't anywhere near the only one. But it sure felt like I was. My eighth grade year was the worst year of my life.  Read more...

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