For as long as I can possibly remember, I have absolutely LOVED Prince. Even way, way back in elementary school, my best friend and I would hole up in her room and blast songs that we knew were completely inappropriate for our innocent, young eardrums. I begged and I pleaded with my mom to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let me see him in concert but was told it would have to be over her stone cold, dead body. You see, my mom had heard all about his "dirty mind" and just what he may or may not do with Sheila E. on stage. So I had to wait -- for over thirty long years, I had to wait in anticipation to finally see his Royal Badness. And I am sorry to say that the wait turned out to leave nothing but a really bad taste in this 80s girl's mouth.
My hopes were certainly sky high on Monday night at the United Center as the show started out with Prince singing covers alongside his gospel-type back-up singers while shimmying across the stage in his infamous stiletto boots. I assured myself that he was just warming up to that moment when he would blow our freaking minds with a jammin' rendition of his crazy long list of hits. He even promised the crowd that he'd be sure to play ALL of our favorites, telling us several times to "call the babysitter" cause we were gonna be there all night.
Stupidly, I believed him as I danced and I belted out lyrics to "Purple Rain", "When Doves Cry" and "Kiss". And when he said goodnight and then jumped back onstage for an encore, I was convinced that this was sure to be one of the greatest nights of music there ever was. But when he stopped after just a couple of songs in the encore, we were all left wanting more, especially since he'd "promised" to deliver.
Luckily, the stadium lights stayed off and the stage lit back up, leading everyone to believe that were, indeed, in store for more royal awesomeness. The stage crew swept off the confetti while we sat chanting for our prince. We waited, and we waited. And then we waited some more. For over thirty friggin' minutes, we remained in our seats like assholes, only for the lights to come back on, signaling the end of the concert. A collective "WTF?" swept through the crowd as we all wondered what the hell had just happened. People were actually boo'ing as they exited the building. Man, had we ever been duped! Who knew that Prince was THAT big of a diva?!
We bitched about it all the way home, trying hard to convince ourselves to break up with him once and for all. Honestly, how could he do that to us? What a smack in the face to his longtime fans! The biggest blow, however, came when we found out through Twitter that the prick apparently ended up coming back out after over an hour to perform two more songs to an almost empty arena! What the frick??!! Why would he do that??!! Needless to say, I remain very bitter about the whole thing. Sure, I will probably find myself inadvertently shaking my booty to "1999" someday in the near future, but for now, his Little Red Corvette pretty much ran over my damn heart like a piece of road kill.
Check out the review from "The Chicago Tribune" to see that I am not alone in my thoughts about the show: "Prince at the United Center More Fizzle Than Sizzle".