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** I often wonder whether I live in a house with two kids or a house with two pigs.

** Driving past a lemonade stand without stopping makes me feel guilty.

** I may or may not be a sucker.

** Gravity can kiss my ass (especially since it's responsible for knocking it down in the first place).

** Parenting without a sense of humor is like driving a car without a steering wheel.

** Screw the devil -- the orthodontist's office is where I should sell my soul.

** Prince Harry apparently dropped more than just some cash in Vegas.

** One of the greatest things about the summer is an impromptu game of "Kick the Can".

** Scooping dog poop while your husband's in Sin City is totally fair.  If it's Backwards Day, that is.

** I love not doing laundry for a day.  Until I realize that I haven't done laundry for a day.  Crap!

** Good old-fashioned book stores need to make a serious comeback.

** A whole other calendar year might very well pass before I can actually get a freaking doctor's appointment.

** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.

SO WHAT DID YOU LEARN THIS WEEK???? >>

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