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It's the Middle of the Night and the Baby Cries...

so WHO gets up?

This has been a constant struggle in my household with both kids.

I think, regardless of whether you're a SAHM or not, it should be a 50/50 share by trading off each night, etc. This rarely happens though!

What do you think?

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Permalink Reply by Amy {Mom Spark} on November 10, 2008 at 9:56am

I'm so sorry your son is having trouble sleeping. I can't even handle waking up once in the night, much less 3-5 times! God bless you!

Sounds like your husband has the magic touch, I wouldn't change a thing there!

It's nice that your husband understands how hard it is to be a SAHM. I'm trying to get mine to figure it out, and he does for the most part, but we still disagree on some things.

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Permalink Reply by Alisha on November 11, 2008 at 11:08am

I agree that it should be a 50/50 trade, but I never execute that trade. I just do it. I think now I just do it out of habit. I figure that since I hear them and am already up I can just get up with them. Why wake up one more person. However, there are nights when my DH hears me with the kids and he will come in to take over for me. I am just grateful that he is willing to do so.

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Permalink Reply by Daren on November 12, 2008 at 2:24am

I know this is a mom's blog but I had to chime in. The mom of my child never gets up in the middle of the night. She doesn't get up in the morning unless I have left for work. I have to work 12hr shifts then do everything when I get home.

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Permalink Reply by Amy {Mom Spark} on November 12, 2008 at 9:28am

Daren-That doesn't seem fair!

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Permalink Reply by Monica on November 12, 2008 at 11:13pm

Well, my husband and I just discussed this tonight. Unfortunately he's a trucker and he's gone all week long, so when he's home on the weekends I expect him to do his part, however.. he's always tired and feels the weekend is his time to rest. His suggestion to me was "Sleep when the baby sleeps". Geez.. after 7 months I'd sort of like a little break here and there, you know what I mean? Being a sahm is a lot harder than I thought it would be.

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Permalink Reply by Amy {Mom Spark} on November 13, 2008 at 10:35am

I totally know what you mean. I just think it should be shared, that way one doesn't get discouraged and both get caught up on rest.

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Permalink Reply by peacebutnotquiet on November 14, 2008 at 12:12am

With the first kid, my husband and I shared nighttime fairly evenly (although I was nursing so sometimes it had to fall to me). Somehow by the third kid, I've ended up being the one to get up most of the time. He says he just doesn't hear the kids so on the few occasions when I've been impossibly tired, or sick, I elbow him in the back and he'll get up. But it's usually easier to just do it myself...and I make all three kids have a quiet time in the afternoon so I can nap! They're going to be in high school and still napping if I can make them.

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Permalink Reply by Jamey on November 15, 2008 at 11:37pm

My husband shares the duty especially when we are trying to break our 11 month old's cycle of crying even when she is not hungry. If she smells me she wants to feed and then she starts sobbing. He has an easier time getting her back to sleep until she is really hungry. I try to take more of the brunt of night duty, but it helps having his support. It also helps that he understands what some of my jobs are as a SAHM when he gets a chance to take part.

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Permalink Reply by Cymbelly on November 16, 2008 at 8:59am

My hubby and I both work, so for us, it's 50/50. But sometimes, he gets up most of the time, and I love him so much for that!

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Permalink Reply by litanyofbrittainy on November 17, 2008 at 12:08am

okay so my 3 year old was a crib sleeper from three months. then somewhere around two there was a sickness or a new tooth and she was allowed to sleep in our bed for some days and never left. then came jack, (okay, so she left occassionally), who is nearly 9 months old is has never slept in his crib. no our sleeping arrangements are so ridiculous in the new house that my hub sleeps upstairs in my daughters room and i sleep downstairs with the baby, and we each tend to the kid that is closest.
but were it not for that we would each pretend we were sleeping through the din of whatever kid woke up, until one of us couldn't stand it and handled it. mostly me though.

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Permalink Reply by Jenn on November 21, 2008 at 9:30am

I always am the one to get up. It was that way with my DS (now 5) and now with my newborn. Granted I BF her so it's a bit different than it was for DS who was formula fed... Honestly it's my decision to get up because I want to check on them and be sure they're safe, LOL!. Sometimes I do want to hit DH in the head so he'll get up when DD starts to cry or DS needs something, but it's just easier for me if I do it. Plus, DH works a very physically demanding job so I'd prefer him to be well rested so he's safe!