Cultivate Theme

The first time I breastfed, I did not have a pleasant experience. Sore nipples, hours on the breast, dry nipples, I hated it all. In fact, it was an emotional drain. Every time I had to go out and it came down to feeding time, I would feel like a cow giving milk. I also got stressed that no matter what, I couldn't take a break from being the feeder. Pumping never worked for me, whether I tried the electric pump or manual pump. I also felt that I did not have enough milk and Jeffrey would be on my breast at times for almost one hour, then feed 1 hour later.

I envied those mothers who told me that they had no problems breastfeeding. In fact, I would hear stories of how milk would at times squirt out of their breasts. That amazed me since only little droplets trickled out of mine. I remember one time when I pumped for 45 minutes and only got 1 ounce of milk. I was so frustrasted that I called my husband at work crying telling him that I cannot feed the baby because I don't have enough milk. I was very upset and was carrying the breast milk into the kitchen when all of a sudden I dropped the milk on the floor. I guess my hands weren't steardy from stress. All that work for nothing! That was not a favorite moment.

I am happy to say that this time around is different. Tyler latched on immediately and at most, he'll feed for 30 min. but usually is done after 20 min. My breasts are swollen and they feel sore from the engorgement. This of course makes me at least feel that I got it right this time. I know that it wasn't my fault but I always felt somehow incompetent with Jeffrey that I couldn't get a natural thing like breastfeeding right.

I still sometimes get fed up with the constant feeding but I think that it's due more to being tired than anything else. Also, the lack of flexibility that it gives me. I get stressed breastfeeding in public so I work around Tyler's feeding schedule whenever I need to get things done outside the house. Do I enjoy breastfeeding? No not really but I know that it's a benefit to Tyler so I'll keep it up as long as I can. I lasted 5 months the first time and hopefully can match it again the second time.

Views: 33

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Breastfeeding isn't always easy, usually not at all at first, but in the end is so worth it. I had a similar experience breastfeeding my first that ended after just three weeks. Six years later I had my second child and breastfed her for 14 months. The difference? I was committed. There's a huge difference between saying "I'd like to try to breastfeed" and telling yourself, "I'm going to breastfeed". That extra boost of confidence and with the support of other moms can make a world of difference.
With my son, who is now 5 years old, I had a terrible time trying to breastfeed him. He wouldn't latch on, screamed the whole time, and when 45 minutes later we would finally nurse for a few minutes, he would stop, be hungry again and we would go through the whole thing over again. I pumped and tried and tried, called lactation consultants, hired one who guaranteed sucess and still had no sucess. I finally realized that in this case breastfeeding was not best. But with my second and third children it was TOTALLY different. Sure I had a few problems especially at first, engorgement, sore nipples, all the usual, but it was good. And the bonding that I was able to experience through nursing is incredible. My youngest is 4 months old. And this time it is a breeze. I love it, I rave about it! Maybe experience is the dfference. Maybe it depends on the child. All I know is that it was worth trying again.
I totally agree with you. My second time around is increasingly easier than the first. I think it had to do with experience. I also was more prepared psychologically because of my first experience. I do feel a closer bond to the second simply because my breastfeeding experience is easier. Thanks for the comment.
I was just thinking about doing a post on Mom Spark on this very subject!

I had an awful time nursing both my boys. My first lasted four months, the second only one month!

For me, it wasn't the sore nipple issue or even the inconvenience, but that I could not fill my babies up. There were never full, which lead to us all feeling exhausted and frustrated. With my second, he was also extremely gassy on my milk.(even with my strict diet) Once I switched to formula they were much happier.

I think breastfeeding is a wonderful thing and it is no doubt the best nutrition for your baby. Saying that, I don't think we should feel bad if it doesn't work out for our family. There is nothing wrong with formula, especially these days. I think many of us moms think we're giving our babies poison if we give them formula! We need to get over that.

The funny thing is that my second, who was only breastfeed the first month has been a healthier baby than my first! He's never had a fever or ear infection, so he must be healthy!
Let me know if you do make a post on breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is a *relationship* between you and your baby. It's totally understandable that it's different the second time around. I was totally committed to nursing my son as long as he wanted it - but that turned out to be not very long! He went on a nursing strike around 5 months and never regained interest. I pumped for what felt like all day, every day, for two months straight, but eventually my supply waned. I was also really jealous of the mothers who said it was a breeze, but I know I did my best and I will the next time, too.
Thanks for the comment. I think that's all that our kids can expect from us, that we try our best.



© 2018   Created by Mom Bloggers Club.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service