** I might be a bit biased, but I'm pretty sure if I was in sixth grade, I'd wanna be friends with my kids.
** Apparently the floor is the best place to hang coats and towels.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on March 6, 2015 at 8:05pm — No Comments
** There's nothing like having your kids barge into your bathroom and present you with a Valentine while you're standing there buck naked.
** I'd be better off shaving my legs with a chain saw than a brand new Lady…Continue
** If I'm in the woods today, I need to avoid men wearing hockey masks.
** Listening to an eleven year old sing in the shower is nothing short of AWESOME.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 13, 2015 at 2:35pm — No Comments
** I am an extremely underpaid entertainment coordinator.
** Nobody wins when Mama oversleeps on a school day.
** You really can't watch…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on February 6, 2015 at 12:03am — No Comments
** Daytime t.v. brings with it some seriously disturbing commercials.
** My kids are probably hungry all the time because most of their food ends up on the floor rather than in their mouths.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 30, 2015 at 3:11pm — No Comments
** Short weeks make you feel like every day is Friday.
** They also make you angry to find out that every day is not, in fact, Friday.
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 23, 2015 at 7:40pm — No Comments
** It's hard to play Dr. Kevorkian, even to a Beta fish who's dying a very slow death.
** Helping with Spanish homework when you don't speak a lick of Spanish is like trying to cook a gourmet meal when you can't even boil…Continue
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 16, 2015 at 12:04pm — No Comments
** I'm not buying whatever Mother Nature is selling.
** My transformation from human to crocodile is nearly complete, thanks to all the dry heat in my house.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on January 9, 2015 at 3:45pm — No Comments
** 'Tis the season to feel like a walking ATM.
** If you're a fan of torturing yourself, I highly recommend going to the mall two weekends before Christmas.…
** If my kids overflow one more toilet around here, they're getting an outhouse for Christmas.
** I could really use an elf.
Added by Jennifer Marshall on December 12, 2014 at 12:13pm — No Comments
** I'm not sure what's disappearing faster around here -- my money or our iPhone chargers.
** When one of your son's best friends has pink eye, YOUR eyes…Continue
** This time of the year makes me so very grateful for my beloved hot glue gun.
** I may steal the dog crate from the dog -- it just looks so darn PRIVATE in there.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on October 24, 2014 at 3:07pm — No Comments
** I'm not sure what scares me more -- Ebola or the thought of having to use the toilet in my kids' bathroom.
** The best hair days always happen when you have absolutely NOWHERE to go.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on October 17, 2014 at 3:34pm — No Comments
** I am totally addicted to selling crap on virtual garage sale sites.
** Finding a CLEAN gas station bathroom is like finding a unicorn.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on October 10, 2014 at 1:46pm — No Comments
** My mind thinks I’m 21, but my body, not so much.
** There’s no such thing as tiptoeing back into reality after vacation.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on October 3, 2014 at 6:26pm — No Comments
** My house is a revolving door of loud, screeching short people. (And I kind of love it.)
** Wearing a dress AND a bra all in one day is quite an accomplishment.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on September 19, 2014 at 3:04pm — No Comments
** "Take a nap" keeps getting bumped off my to-do list for some reason.
** My family is an all-you-can-eat buffet for the multiplying mosquitoes in our neighborhood.…
** A three-day weekend is directly followed by an entire week of not knowing what the hell day it is.
** The shortest weeks often seem like the longest.…
Added by Jennifer Marshall on September 5, 2014 at 1:42pm — No Comments
** The first day of school is a blessing like no other.
** Homework's about to unleash its evil wrath upon us very, very soon.
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 29, 2014 at 12:45pm — No Comments
** I've seen no less than 14,789 people dump ice over their heads throughout the past few days.
** Being the adult is often times way harder than being the kid.
Added by Jennifer Marshall on August 22, 2014 at 5:39pm — No Comments