One of the things I have deliberately decided to improve on is communication with my children. My 8 year old daughter often used to tell me, ‘Mum you’re not listening’ and this went on for a while until I made a decision to change it. More often than not, as parents, and especially Moms, we’re too busy multi-tasking and trying to finish up on this or that and rarely do we give attention to one thing. But I have realised the more we avoid proper communication with our children, the bigger the gap builds between us and sooner than later, tend to loose them to other things, like TV and play station. We will therefore not realise it when our children are going down either in their grades or behaviour until we’re called to school by the Principal to explain our child’s behaviour or falling grades. We will never realise that they’re living in fear until we find a suicide note (God forbid). We can change this however, and its never too late to start.

So how do i begin?

  1. Make time each day, even if for a few minutes, whether morning or evening, to sit and listen to your child and find out how they’re doing. You can have a specific time that you block off and guard jealously that nothing else interferes with it, unless it has to do with your child. He/She takes priority.
  2. Have a dialogue, and give 100% attention. Ensure there are no distractions or interruptions, including your phone.
  3. Overtime, it becomes a habit. When you make it a habit, then your child knows that you care and will be able to trust you more and more with the things that are happening in their lives.
  4. During this time, avoid judging, advising or cautioning. Help your child learn decision making and finding a solution for themselves by asking genuine, helping questions. Once this becomes a habit, you will find that your child can now easily approach you and tell you even the most difficult things they might be dealing with, including peer pressure, failure, etc. You can then help them through these difficult moments.

Begin little, begin today!

All the best!

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