Snark Week- Episode 1-

Bought the kids ice cream cones the other day, and my youngest son told me he was full. He asked me what he should do with it, and my oldest goes, "Just wait til you get home then put it in the fridge. Wait, not the fridge, the freezer. Don't put it in the freezer!" My youngest rolls his eyes and says in his most superior tone, "Duh! You don't have to tell me that. Who would be stupid enough to put ice cream in the 'fridgerator'."

 I burst out laughing, which probably wasn't the best reaction because when I pulled myself together enough to tell him we don't use the word stupid, he just shrugged...hmm. 

Snark Week-Episode 2-

Enjoying yet another Power Ranger marathon with the kids. I left the room to get a drink, and could hear the kids whispering (they really suck at whispering. Their whispers are like my normal talk, plus hissing. It's kinda sad, actually.) 

Youngest: Man, I'm tired of this Power Rangers.

Daughter: So tell Mommy you want to watch a different season.

Oldest: Yeah right, like Mommy will let us. I think she likes this more than we do.

Youngest: No way! I love Power Rangers.

Daughter: Plus Mommy is a grown up. Old people don't like Power Rangers a lot.

Oldest: I don't know. Mommy REALLY likes Tommy. So I think we're stuck with Mighty Morphin for now.

Umm...whatever. I don't like Power Rangers more than they do. I just prefer that season to the others...and Tommy is totally cute. And I'm not old. And wow. My kids suck.

Snark Week- Episode 3-

We're going to Walmart, and I send the kids to get dressed. I throw on some sweats and a big t-shirt, and pull my hair up in a messy bun on top of my head. I mean, I'd slept like 2 hrs the night before and couldn't drum up the give a damn to fix myself up. I did put on some lipstick, but that's it. They kids come out, and all look like homeless people. Their clothes are dirty and ill-fitting, and they still have bedhead. It's like they dug in the bottom of the hamper for the grossest things they could put on. Which is in fact what they did. I found the pile of clothes on the floor next to the hamper. I sent them back to change into clean, cute clothes. 

They come back out a few minutes later, a little disgruntled. My daughter keeps staring at me, and finally, feeling defensive,

Me: What?

Daughter: Are you going to get dressed?

Me: I am dressed. 

D: But you're wearing that.

Oldest: And you didn't brush your hair.

Youngest: How come you can go out in your PJs but we can't?

Me: I'm not in my PJs, and I did brush my hair.

D: Did you finish?

Me: Yes, I finished!

D: Oh. 

O: I guess you're ready then. 

Me: (stomp out of room)

I was a bit offended and disgruntled myself after this interaction. But then I realized that's how they must have felt when I made them change and told them they looked like homeless people...kinda rude, I know. And now it's just freaking hilarious.

Jen-What's Wrong With Mommy?