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Pregnancy After Stillbirth: The Moment When You Realize You’ve Moved Forward

This weekend was amazing. The sun was out, the weather was warm. It was 70 degrees in March – that’s a regular old heatwave for Minnesota!

There’s this distinct smell that comes along with springtime in the frigid tundra. It kind of reminds me of Seattle after a big rainstorm – like a whiff of the coast is coming in with the wind. It’s glorious. It makes me want to pull out all of our patio furniture and start planting flowers.

Of course, it’s still only March, so we can’t go crazy.

Last year, we didn’t get the spring smell until much later in the year. And it carried through well past when we lost her.

The day we came home from the hospital, Rick and I sat on our deck for two hours, drinking coffee and smelling the fresh air while Ricky napped. Everything about our experience was still so fresh, but I felt like I had aged twenty years in the span of five days. I sat there, trying to find something positive to come out of our experience. Tired of crying, there just were no more tears or feelings to be had. Other than figuring out how we were going to make things as normal as possible for our then 21 month old...Continue reading at The Mommyhood Project

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