Let me give you a little back story before I get into my silly story today. Our Mum is deathly afraid of
S-N-A-K-E-S, yes I'm spelling it. When I was little I wasn't allowed to say that word because she soooo didn't like them. Even now, my boys have to hide their rubber fake one's before she comes over. Well, I'm not a big fan of them either, but as long as they don't sneak up on me, I don't really mind them. This year we seem to have more snakes than ever! On Saturday I was surprised by 4 of them on 4 different occasions. This caused me to scream like someone being chased by a maniac in a horror movie. Damn stupid snakes! Yesterday when we got home I went outside to walk the dog....well, as soon as I stepped off of the steps there was a huge one just sitting there! Maybe not full size Anaconda, but maybe a baby one. I immediately started to try to get him or her away from the house, that's all I need under our porch. Of course it went back under there. Great! Now every time I walk outside I will think it's going to bite my ankle, bring me down to the ground and attack me. Seeing how it's a Garter snake, that probably won't happen, but still it's yucky! Later on it came back out and the boys were outside with me. They were super excited that they could try to help kill, get rid of the snake. My youngest grabbed a flip flop and threw it at it. He had good aim, but I don't know what he thought was going to happen to it by hitting it with a foam flip flop. I grabbed an aluminum bat thinking I could hit it on the head and kill it. My oldest yelled, "Mom I'll be your back up", I turn to see him wielding his light saber. "What are you going to do with that?", I said. "I'm going to be your back up". O K A Y, maybe if it was a real light saber and not a plastic one it would be helpful. By this time my youngest had grabbed a whiffle ball bat. So, there we all stood, whiffle ball bat, aluminum bat, and light saber. We chased the snake into a corner.....which let me tell you they don'tlike at all! It was very angry and started jumping at us. I don't know how the hell it could jump without legs, but it was jumping! If you ever corner a snake, you'll know what I mean, but again, I don't suggest it. Truthfully I could of hit it with the aluminum bat and killed it, but the thought was really icky and I wasn't sure how much of it's guts would spray on us. Of course because my girly-ness made me hesitate, the snake got back under the porch.
When my husband got home we told him about our Serpent Hunting. Our youngest asked, "what are you going to do about the snake Dad?" And he said, "nothing". What???? You have to kill it or get rid of it. He did say that he would pick it up and throw it into the woods. Yep, pick it up, with his hands. Yuck! I'm so glad I'm not a guy!
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