The grass is greener in someone else’s yard

The pitfalls of advertising and media

Do you sometimes feel like something is missing in your life? Do you feel as you need just one particular thing, and you might finally feel fulfilled and happy. Do you look to the others and you think they leave happily lives that are orderly and complete? Now I am going to tell you that “perfect life” does not exist and that it’s myth. But as I felt that way for many times I am writing this article now asI don’t want you to fall into the trap.


Turn on TV and you will be overwhelmed by advertisements.. you will get complete instructions that products you should buy, to look exactly the same as people from TV. You might see perfect haircuts and white teeth. The woman might be in beautiful dresses and high hills while taking children to the creche. The man goes to work in perfectly tidy shirts after arguing with the children during the breakfast. More alike they’ve got stains from food that children were throwing, but you can not see that on TV.

If you take a professional makeup artist, you will look just great in 15 min. We all know what make-up can do. However, “ordinary” people don’t have the make-up artist or fashion consultant.

But the most important is that we sometimes really believe that the perfect life exists somewhere very far from us, and we fall of what is being served to us. In the end, we are frustrated, and we think that is something wrong with us.

We do not have a perfect haircut and tidy shirts after our kids were eating the breakfast and shooting each other with leftovers playing the game. We do not wear high hills to work or to buy groceries, or while taking children to creche or school. Running after them we might fall quite easily. So we rather choose something more comfortable.

The day just has started, and you already feel tired. You would not smile for the rest of your day as you watch at TV. More alike you are ready to go back to bed, but there is still so much stuff you need to do.

So whatever you do during the day…working, cleaning, cooking when you want to relax with the glass of wine sitting on the sofa and watching TV you get so frustrated about advertisements that are not real.

You look all that clean houses and perfect children who do not run or shed water to the floor and you don’t get that’s all about the commercial.

Too bad we can not be there after the shooting to see how to people look after they remove make-up and whether the “perfect” children were playing still or screaming and running around in the studio because they already feel bored.

We would probably witness the second scene. If you look at the pictures of celebrities without make-up, you would see that they just look like you, yours (mine) neighbors or me.

I was also a victim. I didn’t feel bad watching something on TV, but I felt bad when saw all that polished profiles at social networks. Most of them are on the network because they present their work or product. It looks like most of them gave great lives and great careers.

But then I realized that my profile also looks quite well. This is what you see on my Twitter – Blogger (lifestyle), passionate reader, coffee addict, dreamer, open-minded, friendly; mother of adorable little girl and wife to the fantastic husband.

All of it’s true. But what does it mean fantastic husband. Yes, he is great but it doesn’t mean we never had rough times. We never the had serious problem when it comes to our relationship, but we’ve got some serious health issues. I was sick during the pregnancy and almost had died. I wrote so many times about it. You can have a look at it here.

So yes the life is good for us but it’s not really that all things in our lives were always at our side or smooth. The prob is the same with the other people as well. What you know about them when you come to their profile? In opposite way what they surely know about you?!

I used to watch the interviews, and I used to feel bad entirely afterward. I thought all of those people never had problems in their life. They have an incredible life that I call “American dream.” They never been sick or lost loved once. They have never been unemployed.

None of us is always at the top, nor is it always the “bottom”. Everything is about to change in life. . Nothing is always the same; neither is still. And let’s not forget that “many” that we “admired” fallen. Look at the celebrities. How many of them could not cope with pressure and expectations to be unmistakable and perfect? It’s not strange they couldn’t take the pressure. That’s why it’s so dangerous!

Instead of telling us to be who we are and to be authentic we are all in the same basket. Why?! Because we live in a consumerist society, and if you do not believe that you need the particular product you will not buy it. If you believe them that they can easily manipulate with you.

They don’t take us as unique but as sheep. That’s the truth. But we shouldn’t forget where did we come from and that we worth.We need to treasure our authenticity and develop in continuously by our gifts and talents.

As I mostly pay attention to bloggers, I can tell you that there are brilliant works out there, authentic and creative stuff that came from the heart. But there is also another group that forgets why started to write, and they were kind of stuck in numbers, stats and marketing in general. It’s all about some tips and blah, blah. I do not judge them. I almost end up there as well. It’s very easy to slip up.

We can’t create from the heart if we regularly have in mind that we need to satisfy somebody’s criteria or collect more funs.In the end, you give power to someone else to give value to you that you already have, and you don’t need at all. At the same time, you are under loads of pressure that is not healthy and don not make anything good to you. You do not need that pressure. Listen to your inner voice. Follow the rhythm of your body and soul (inner voice).

Please do not read the bunch of stuff what you should do and what you need to avoid etc. Read stuff that inspire and encourage you to be who you are.

You can live fulfilled life but listening to your feeling and inner voice. And please stop think that you should do anything. Do thinks because you like them to do not to prove yourself. And please never forget that the happiness is a matter of choice rather than circumstances.

Pay attention to your feeling. They will always tell you where you are. Be yourself. Don’t compete. If your feel comfortable in your skin and you enjoy in things you do, it means that is a good way for you. If you feel frustrated or worried, it means you went far away from yourself, and you just need to get back. Be honest with yourself and your feelings will always tell you the truth. Do not be a slave consumerism society. You have your rhythm. You are exactly at the right place you should be at the moment. Believe to a process of life and God.

I caught myself for so many times doing it a thing because I think I have instead of I want to. If I do things because I have to, I feel worried. I feel pain in my stomach and my spine. Of course, I tortured myself with something I didn’t want to do. I couldn’t be in the balance that way. The body always react.

I’ll give you an example. I wrote two blogs. One of them is Croatian blog. The Croatian language is my mother tongue. As I was recently more concentrate to an English one, I felt a bit guilty. I didn’t write Croatian post for a two weeks ( I did it today). Making pressure on myself that I need to do it I couldn’t. I wasn’t in a mood. I can not write just to post something. My articles are one hundred percent mine, and I only can write if I feel from inside I have a message or want to express a feeling or whatever it is. But just write with no passion it does not work for me.

As I couldn’t write (it wouldn’t happen for sure if I hadn’t tried to force myself on writing) as felt exhausted and wanted to leave writing in Croatia. That was a bad idea because there is no language I can express myself better than in The Croatian language. It’s my mother tongue that I adore and use for whole my life.

Language = identity.

You can see some of me, but the right expression, eloquence and all that kind of stuff you can not see as English is not my mother tongue. Once you might have a chance but at the moment you and I need to satisfied with the level of knowledge I have. :)

When I stop thinking about it, I just wrote the article very easily. The same article you read now but in the Croatian language. I’ve got some excellent feedbacks. If I wrote just to publish something with no feelings, they would get more of my posts but I am sure the feedback would not be the same.What we can get from mechanical writing. Nothing. That’s not the way I want to write for sure. If it means you’ll get article monthly then fine. But you will not get an article just because I want to publish it.

I’d like to hear from you. Please tell me to know do you cope with commercials. I honestly want to know.

Feel free to share the article if you like it or think that is useful.

Feel free to visit my blog at: Inspirational Woman


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Comment by Rahela Vukusic Drusko on October 25, 2015 at 5:27am

Hi Tiffaniy, great comment. Thanx a million. :) We loose so much energy on compiting who with? Why?! Have a lovely day, Rahela

Comment by Tiffany Benyacko on October 23, 2015 at 6:40pm

Great post! I most recently settled my perfection quest. It's hard when you think you see everybody else around looking more beautiful, more fit, more wealthier, I could keep going on and on. I finally realized that perfection is something that doesn't want to be caught, so why should I keep chasing it? Thanks for posting!

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