So Friday I briefly mentioned that we have had some issues lately.
See, we have a very spirited boy, from the time he could walk (nine months) he was aggressive, rough, disobedient etc.
We had a few good months but it seems we are back to square one. By square one I mean slapping friends across the face, and biting the teacher. I mean at least he didn't push a kid out of a chair then proceeded to throw said chair at the child oh, wait, that was last year!But we have some great teachers and friends that have been full of advice, encouragement, and understanding. One of the best comforting statement I heard this week was, "It really does take a village to raise a child". That is why the Lord has placed such amazing christian women and families in our life!
Okay so my husband have talked and talked together, with friends and with family since Thursday and guess what we think we have found the problem!!!! Us!!!!!
That's right I said, Us! You see we decided we needed to dig beyond the problem at hand, the root you see! The Roots for our sons behavior seemed to point at us! So we have implemented lots of change and they all revolve around us the parents. Seems a lot easier to change our behavior than a three year olds. So some changes we have decided to make:
•more outside play ( you see I am a read a book, watch TV type girl and I don't like outside, but as an active spirited boy he needs plenty outside time)
•daily devos for me and him ( attitudes can be better when we start each day with a cup of coffee or juice and Jesus)
•more daddy time, sports games, wrestling, outside time etc
• family time active family time
•consistent and known discipline ( same spot, same rules, everyday, every parent)
•less toys (you see we took most of his toys away, put them in the closet. We will rotate them out every couple of months, or use. Few of them as rewards to play with on good days. For example if he has a good day at mothers day out Tuesday we will play kitchen that afternoon, but it will definitely calm things down during the day)
•sleeping on his own ( okay so he slept on his own but I would have to lay beside the bed with my arm draped across him as if holding him. We made it there from sleeping in his room this summer. We have made it too leaving the doors of our rooms open and I sit in view of him. It works, I can be busy, blog, bible study, visit with my husband. Which is what I did last night and one AM snuck up on us because it was a rare thing)
•the biggest change will be in our attitudes, how we approach him (for me I'm emotional... And I lose it and he is emotional too so he plays off me. So we are changing. I will stay calm and level as well as my husband when those bad choices come which face it they will And often. But he will listen and focus better if we aren't battling it out)
• we are not using the word. BAD. Bad kid, bad etc they are lots of ways to use it. So when we catch ourselves it will be phrased as bad choices. Because he is not a bad kid and we don't want to label him this way.
•we have a schedule, we will follow it for when our day starts and again when our day ends.
•napping on his own or no Naps. See I have napped with him for three years. It is a luxury really though really nice and I will miss these. But I need him sleeping through the night and getting well rested. Sundays will be the only exception... Family nap day
Well I think this is the just of what I can remember tonight. For the most part we will be making a more conscious effort to have a more purposeful parenting approach. If this doesn't seem to work in the next few months off to the child study center ha!
Oh and lots of prayer in the meantime!
My little man is a very loving and sweet boy, he just also is very spirited, independent, and strong willed!