Never leave your cup of coffee unattended with a dog (especially when it's a 7lb puppy). Caffeine does not fare well with them.
You WILL run into an ex boyfriend, eventually. Just hope that it's not while you're at the supermarket. Also hope you're not wearing a baseball hat with your grey roots STILL showing, or in your "I just got my period and feel like a complete mess" clothing.
Make sure to hit "save" now and then if you are working on a project on your laptop. Especially when there is a thunder/hail/lightening storm going on. Three hours of work is a lot to lose.
If a bowl of cereal looks like it is a little too full. Go with your gut....it IS too full. And if you think it will end up falling before your child makes it downstairs. It WILL end up falling before your child makes it downstairs. Your dog will enjoy the frosted flakes with his cup of coffee.
5. Fake a stomachache now and then. It will get you a good hour or two to nap and escape the madness.